the elf in the back yard...

 
I got into trouble for lying to Mom once.  I was walking
through the living room where she sat with the soaps...
that's where I stopped to tell her about the elf in the back yard.
I admit it didn't take much for her to up jump and take off.  

I heard her grumbling as she came back in the door,
sort of slamming it and calling me a liar.

"Didn't you see him?"  I asked
She said, "Yes, you lying little girl, I saw him,
and his dick wasn't anywhere near a foot and a half long!"