Image for the poem Numb My Heart(collab of Visual Lyricist, Prophet and Shaman)

Numb My Heart(collab of Visual Lyricist, Prophet and Shaman)

The storm brings fury in its wake
Shaking my walls, cracking my foundation
Splitting the beams that shelter my vulnerability
Within a blink, it vanishes,
Leaving me less of a man than before
To rebuild seems unlikely,
To die, a more probable scenario,
Is foremost on my mind
For what I once built
Lay in rumbled heaps at my feet
What's left is destruction and hopelessness

I walk through the rubble of what once was
The very walls that sheltered me, I stand upon
Years and years of hard work only to be crumbled by her
I gave her everything, down to the air in my lungs
Now it hurts to breathe, blink, even stand
With the words "I'm leaving you" that escaped her luscious lips
I felt the pain in my heart pierce my soul
Her words, the storm that bought forth fury
The words that shook my walls, cracked my foundation
Splitting the beams that sheltered my vulnerability
Now I feel like less of a man then I did before

All that once was has now been washed away, 
in the wake of the storm,
I gasp in horror at what has occurred. 
Some would say, that "it's okay, It's alright,
You're still here, you're alive, you breathe. 
That's what matters. 
Be grateful for a second chance at life."
Yet, in that moment, 
that the storm of heartbreak washes over me,
My life IS over. There is no hope, and ALL is Lost.
It is my life that was washed away, and all that is left
is the sadness of a broken soul, 
mixed with the bitter agony of defeat

The density of my screams bounce off the sky
Clouds roar back with echoing laughter
I was foolish to think that the love we built
Could withstand the torrential cascade of bitterness
That effortlessly tore apart our bonds
Now I am left, as this fallen structure
Decaying against the pelting rain
That slowly washes our love away
The walls I will build again, when hurt subsides
Will block you out forever, letting you in never
And numb my heart to the pain of your memory

I will build these walls with confidence
A foundation built of the pain you caused
The pain that after many years made strong
My new home will protect me like a mother does a child
Sturdy enough to withstand the bad weather life will put it through
I will lock away my heart in a safe, behind the walls
No women shall ever have the key again
She will be able to find it only if her heart has been torn like mine
Then, and only then will her heart know where to look

My fortress of hardness is the key to my solitude
I never will allow myself to feel again,
fleeing from the perpetual possibility of pain
Why reach out my heart, just to have it shattered?
Why extend myself, to only feel stranded, and alone.
I build my walls into the sky,
putting myself in the highest tower of my castle,
in an attempt to block away my sorrow,
But it bubbles in, under the surface, 
and this moat of hate surrounds my palace of malice.
I have trapped myself here, trying forever not to feel.
After the storm washed away the world's ills,
The world moved on, but here I stay.
For me, there is no escape, for I chose to wall myself away.
All the choices that once lay before me
are now a distant memory of a past that could have been.
There IS now no way out. The path of healing is behind me.
Heart that once was is no more. I fall inward to my pain.
I turn myself away, then hang my head and sigh.
Written by lashawnscott92 (Visual Lyricist)
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 5 reading list entries 4
comments 3 reads 1455
Commenting Preference: 
The author encourages honest critique.

Latest Forum Discussions
Today 2:50pm by robert43041
Today 2:19pm by robert43041
Today 1:01pm by Abracadabra
Today 7:27am by Naajir
Today 4:27am by SweetKittyCat5
Today 4:16am by Michael_Goodridge