This Battle

I…
Can feel the soul of me fanning out…reaching
Needing to be connected. I can feel… my soul seeking
The source of my rejection….
I have got to find my Right Direction… My True North
If you will… because lately.. its been hard just standing still
As I try to decipher… this cosmic puzzle laid out before me
Sometimes it feels like Creator simply ignores me….Yet
I digress as I try not to break from bending under life’s stress
As the tides of life continually crest… I wonder if I’m wicked…
Cause I get NO REST…
As I hear the Elders whisper to me… “ A Change is gonna come
I look wistfully into the future feeling pensive & kinda numb…
I have become more self aware  seeing insights inside of me…
I have meditated seeking soul elevation like the Celestine Prophecy
I have cried… cathartic tears…because natural tears  heal pain…
Needless to say I’ve cried more this year than it’s rained…
I strive …in silence… trying hard not to break…just don’t know
How much more  I can take… see I’m a weathered old soul…
Seen many a battle… and fought many wars…
Now… I pray my hearts desires… Reaches  Creator …. And the Stars…
Im too tired to go back now… and too tired  to carry on….
I wonder … how THIS internal battle will be won….