Behind closed doors

If we plan to grow old together
we need to reserve time for ourselves
otherwise we'll both be shells of who we were
by the time we're thirty.
We already ache
Nothing special happens anyways
I'm unimpressed.
I'm drawn to people I've imagined in my head.
You could say I've been on autopilot for a couple months now.
"Yeah, that sucks" "I am sorry," "Love you too"
"stay safe" "can't wait for summer"
"I wasn't shouting, I wasn't shouting, if you can't calm down then I am leaving,
if you do not chill out, I'm leaving."
We haven't lived in a while, we've just been breathing,
and I'm not comfortable with that.