deepundergroundpoetry.com

Detox

I have this irrational fear
Of running into you and
Not knowing what to do
Or what to say.
What if I freak out?
What if I run the other way?
Do you know how I feel?
It made me feel more alone
When you just up and left
With no reason to come back.
Do you know how much I hate you for that?
I am trying to get it all, including you,
Out of my system. It is all a detox of
The sad and bad things. It is like clearing
My system of all the hurt and toxins.
I am trying to let the anger dissolve
And slowly fade away. I am trying
To forgive you like I have
Done in the past. Forgive me while
I am trying to let go of the
Disappointment and frustration.
Do not be mad when I am trying
To move on and completely forget
About you. It feels like by the time
You are willing and ready, I will
Be already done with you.
I will not let you become
My crutch and drug anymore.
I will not cave and give in to you.
I will not relapse and overdose.
You were my antidote. Now I am
The antidote for myself.
I am my own detox. I am my own.
Written by eswaller
Published
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