"10 Years of Separation"

The look in your eyes when seeing
you again, after so many years

I don't know what most I feared; the
initial reacquainting, or, disappointment
that I thought I'd be confronted with
therein

10 years of separation is a vast amount
of time to be away from a daughter whom you hadn't been near since she
was six

When thinking about it over the days
and months and years that quickly came, and, then, disappeared into the rearview,
so many times it made me sick

After I'd talk to her on the phone, I'd bury my pain night after night with pills and 1\5th's to the pain ease and get through;

Fuck, I'd barely make it through

The loss or separation of a child who's
in your heart and loved, is a pain that eats into your soul and swallows you
whole

And, then, when I stepped off the plane and took a breath, it was like a second wind; I settled back into the
Pacific Northwest that I loved, but,
counted the moments that I'd see you for the first time again, (the first being when the Doctors put you into my arms)

And, then, the day that we arranged to meet and have dinner and we afterwards walked through through the mall; conversation led upto...

"I'm Sorry for having been gone so   long,"

Your response eased all my fears and released my tears when you said to me...

"Dad, I'm Happy that You're finally here"