It's all lies

It began, like all messy lies do
in a storm of muddled words
Didn't feel right to me
Young, but not blind  
Saw the struggle on your face
of the words colliding towards your mouth
long before they reached your lips
 
I was lonely, you said
and drunk (of course)
She was there
and I was not
It was a simple story
with simple words
A poetic tragedy nonetheless
 
paying attention
to your pained expression
I heard the thousand echoes  
of the times you have said this before
to women you think are like me
but are not me
 
to the women you have left
lost, and found
Who yelled and cried
and fought
for your love
only to hear you say
I'm walking away
 
But still I sit
and you wait, for the excuse
for me to give you the reason
to say sorry, I'm not good at this
its over
 
And still I sit
and calmly roll-off my tongue, the "F" word
though not the one you're expecting
I forgive you I say
Your rigid body
does little to hide the shock
 
The confusion is now yours
create your own excuse to run, I muse
or live with the fear  
of staying a little longer
in this mess
to fuck it up once more