that blanket

 I see you lying there, my precious one.
Wild red hair- fine as silk
Frame you're beautiful face.
slender fingers grip that blanket
Holding it close.
And I remember
Watching that blanket take shape
Waiting in the doctors office
Click, click, click- needles tapping rhythmically
Listening to the nurse tell me  
Everything was fine.
And I remember
Draping that blanket
across my tummy each night
Singing, laughing, telling stories
And I remember
Screaming while I held that blanket
Begging for it to stop
Praying for my life to end
That blanket must serve its purpose.
And I remember the months that followed
When I clutched that blanket close
I couldn't eat I couldn't sleep
I couldnt put it down
Now I see you lying there, my precious one.
Holding that blanket close.  
And I see him lying next to you
And my heart breaks all over again.
I only wish you could see him too.