Pregnancy Test

My heart is racing,
My hands are sweaty,
I know clearly
That I'm not ready.

I shout to God
Words not to be heard,
"Oh please, oh please,
Don't let it be confirmed!"

I make a promise,
The same one as before.
I've broken it so many times
But I swear "No more."

Could this be it,
The deal I made?
My debt, I don't
Want to be paid.

The clock is ticking,
In every way and form;
This has been the longest
Three minutes in my dorm.

The alarm sounds
And I go running
But what I wanted so badly
Now has me shunning.

I'm frozen solid
Still in my tracks,
Holding my fate
Knowing there're no "Take Backs."

I close my eyes,
Turn it around,
I muster the courage
And it falls to the ground.

The tears start coming,
I can hardly breath.
"Oh my God,
Its not just me."