deepundergroundpoetry.com
vigil for her who is lost
I’ve lost a poem, have you seen her?
she’s not very tall, perhaps 5 or 6 stanzas high;
metaphors cling loosely to her like rags.
I’m not sure if she’s applying make-up now,
and her hair is probably a mess.
I didn’t have time to teach her proper values,
but she knows a lot about sex
and nothing at all about love;
or else she certainly has misconceptions of it.
and of course, that’s my fault.
my fear is that she’ll run to the bad part of town.
she’ll be drawn to the loud music,
the garish neon & nefarious, smoky air.
she knows the fallen angels & the whores in my lurid
tales; they may have told her unsavory things.
she’s a rebel, wayward as the wind,
full of lust for raw living, but unaware.
if she’s taken by slick approaches & motel rooms,
she might end up in a dirty paperback. how
mournful & unjust: prostituting herself for publication.
I wonder if Whitman or Sandburg ever had such a problem,
letting loose their poems, to grow up the hard way;
mean streets & tangled sheets. it’s crazy for me
to worry, I suppose, as if she were mine to possess.
she’s out there with her secrets: the secrets of a poem.
that spirit, that spirit of fire in her –
it will call to you silently…
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Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 5:17am
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 7:17am
Beautiful, sir, as always.
"she’ll be drawn to the loud music,
the garish neon & nefarious, smoky air. "
"she’s a rebel, wayward as the wind,
full of lust for raw living, but unaware. "
Somehow, I find bits of myself in these lines...
"she’ll be drawn to the loud music,
the garish neon & nefarious, smoky air. "
"she’s a rebel, wayward as the wind,
full of lust for raw living, but unaware. "
Somehow, I find bits of myself in these lines...
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 7:33am
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 7:37am
This is fucking amazing.. are you serious,
wooow.. I am un'finished with this one.
~~~
~~~!
One reason why to love an artisans canvas
of poetry and portraits.. of whatever the
depiction..
Because so much is beheld..
-Howlings
wooow.. I am un'finished with this one.
~~~
~~~!
One reason why to love an artisans canvas
of poetry and portraits.. of whatever the
depiction..
Because so much is beheld..
-Howlings
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 10:16am
A great idea expressed so bloody well sir! I think I saw her in a low-life bar near to where I live doing a slutty dance to decadent music!
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
Anonymous
12th Feb 2016 12:03pm
How clever you are! But maybe she knows more than you give her credit for. Maybe she is exactly how she wants to be.
This is very well done. Well written and smart.
This is very well done. Well written and smart.
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 4:06pm
Beautiful, John.
she’s out there with her secrets: the secrets of a poem.
There's something that's nagging at me about this line but I can't put my finger on it.
I'll let it gestate and see what opens.
she’s out there with her secrets: the secrets of a poem.
There's something that's nagging at me about this line but I can't put my finger on it.
I'll let it gestate and see what opens.
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 4:44pm
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 5:22pm
this has a sweet protective gentleness about it ... very well written JohnFeddeler ...
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 5:57pm
I love reading your words when I log in. This was superbly done. She lives within....<3
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 6:58pm
Such a clever piece and so well written. It stands on it's own so easily and yet to have read some or many of your other work makes it that much better. This goes onto my reading list to be read over and over again just to see a master at work and playing within his own body of work. Fantastic.
John
John
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 8:08pm
now here's a man who tunes in to the vibrations of women. you are a marvel at your craft ,John. just pure excellence
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
12th Feb 2016 8:56pm
That's a really clever idea, the lady inhabiting your poem, looking for trouble as always. Never lost as long as you're around.
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
13th Feb 2016 1:01am
Anonymous
- Edited 25th Sep 2020 3:45am
13th Feb 2016 3:01am
<< post removed >>
Re. vigil for her who is lost
13th Feb 2016 2:04pm
She turns the pages slowly...for fear of shattering among your lines.... - with a twisted tongue, I whisper my adoration, blue angel
1
Anonymous
- Edited 18th Feb 2023 2:45am
14th Feb 2016 5:03am
<< post removed >>
Re. vigil for her who is lost
14th Feb 2016 7:45am
what else can I add but to say this is inspired - love what yo do with words..curtsy bow
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Re. vigil for her who is lost
15th Feb 2016 8:51am
Re. vigil for her who is lost
17th Feb 2016 10:16pm
OMG! Sublime! Stellar, this ink! John, you amaze me each time I pass through your art gallery.... Love this!
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
20th Feb 2016 9:20am
John what a clever, intimate write your feelings for this wayward one are of a protective nature is true beauty love Crim
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
25th Feb 2016 10:44am
i am sure she roams
twixt t'highways
where
there's neon lights
& good bourbon
xo
twixt t'highways
where
there's neon lights
& good bourbon
xo
1
Re. vigil for her who is lost
28th Feb 2016 7:35pm
Re. vigil for her who is lost
17th Jan 2017 2:04pm
Sush an amazing metaphore, John, the naive embodiment of a beautiful woman within the lines of a clever poem. There are simply too many outstanding lines for me to pick a favorite.
Impressive poetry...
Impressive poetry...
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