Motion

Motion.
Going on…
Moving forward
Leaving the past behind.
There is a funny thing when someone says
“I’m moving on”
Because how did they stop?
They couldn’t halt time
and even if they did,
as they lay in bed
maybe full of happiness
or full of regret
their heart still beats
pushing them into the next second
of eternity
and maybe your heart is just like a clock
counting down each pump
taking away time
that could have been filled with love
but if you’re heart doesn’t beat alone anymore
if its coordinated itself
to tick with whoever holds you tight
then your heart becomes like a mine  
a time bomb
that when it goes off
it fractures whoever’s closest
then the empty resides.
So maybe “not moving on”
is just thoughtful thinking    
a mindset where you can stay
safe
close by your lover
hoping time doesn’t
set off the grenade
But, I, I choose to keep moving
racing time, hoping to be one step ahead
lately, i’ve gotten off track and distracted
but trying to avoiding the grenades
exploding in the path that I’ve set
has quickly awaken me to where I should have been
and the ashes from the eruption burnt my skin
and I’m more damaged than the last second
that my heart beat me in
I tell myself I’m okay
I convince myself that this isn’t the worst
and I move on
Maybe it’s made me a little numb
and I find myself getting less attached
and more withdrawn
because if you’re a safe distance from every bomb
then nothing can fragment you
But I’ve found that some shelters
can be deceived
and once you think you’re safe
you find some lit TNT
already sparking
about to blow
but you’re too alone or careless
to run anymore
so you slump down and
embrace for impact
but this time it reaches and singes your soul
and the quickest little blimp of time
shocks you
and your heart skips a beat
maybe that’s the second
where you choose defeat
and you hold on to the ashes
that can’t be revived
but you just hold on because
moving is too hard.
But as your grip loosens
as the ashes trickle through your fingers
and the wind blows the rest away
you soon forget the feeling
of loss
You put things back into perspective
and you finally get up
you reset and readjust
and go back into the minefield
of loneliness or love
the cycle repeats
maybe with more or less beats
in the gaps this time
and then sometimes
so many bombs go off around you
theres not anymore ground to stand on
but life is a game of risk
and if you’re brave
you’ll make acquaintances  
and maybe one of them
will turn out to be the one
who goes in sync
with your heartbeat
Then you’ll realise you’re
the biggest time bomb of all
and you pray every pulsing moment
that your heart won’t stop
so they won’t have to endure
the same feeling...
of the explosion of loss and love.