deepundergroundpoetry.com
Siren
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she moves like whispers on the wind
tiptoe through her house of glass
soft-footed, fragile, limber-limbed
step outside through crystal grass
tiptoe through her house of glass
be careful where you tread
step outside through crystal grass
where fragile soft feet bled
be careful where you tread
missteps will send you crashing
where fragile soft feet bled
and tender hearts die smashing
missteps will send you crashing
soft-footed, fragile, limber-limbed
and tender hearts die smashing
she moves like whispers on the wind
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I'm in love with the pantoum form! It's so fun to work with and see what comes out of it.
she moves like whispers on the wind
tiptoe through her house of glass
soft-footed, fragile, limber-limbed
step outside through crystal grass
tiptoe through her house of glass
be careful where you tread
step outside through crystal grass
where fragile soft feet bled
be careful where you tread
missteps will send you crashing
where fragile soft feet bled
and tender hearts die smashing
missteps will send you crashing
soft-footed, fragile, limber-limbed
and tender hearts die smashing
she moves like whispers on the wind
------------------------------------------
I'm in love with the pantoum form! It's so fun to work with and see what comes out of it.
Published 3rd Nov 2015
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comments 5
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The author encourages honest critique.
5th Nov 2015 7:21pm
6th Nov 2015 4:51am
8th Nov 2015 4:43am
Thank you! I was inspired by a prompt from another site. And now I can't stop writing pantoum! They are so intriguing and really fun to write. It's like fitting a puzzle together with words.
10th Dec 2015 8:41pm
Harliequin, luv ~ :-*
Not only is the pantoum form fascinating, the way you are working with it is as well. This piece, for instance, aptly named Siren, is rather jewel-like and precious.
Somewhat about it is reminding me of exquisite, soft scents drifting on the breeze and hauntingly lovely strains of music enticing one along almost tempting one to ignore the possibility of those fragile, bloodied feet and tender, crushed hearts.
Such striking imagery you've utilized here imbued with a taut sense of incipient heartache and danger rather than death by blatant sexual lure. Cleverly done, luv - beautifully done... :-*
Not only is the pantoum form fascinating, the way you are working with it is as well. This piece, for instance, aptly named Siren, is rather jewel-like and precious.
Somewhat about it is reminding me of exquisite, soft scents drifting on the breeze and hauntingly lovely strains of music enticing one along almost tempting one to ignore the possibility of those fragile, bloodied feet and tender, crushed hearts.
Such striking imagery you've utilized here imbued with a taut sense of incipient heartache and danger rather than death by blatant sexual lure. Cleverly done, luv - beautifully done... :-*
15th Jun 2023 6:53pm
