Unrecognizable

From the beginning to the end
I just can't seem to piece it together
It's like I was with two different people
Living inside the same body and mind
They had the same familiar voice
And spoke similar words of kindness
But actions they displayed
Were as different as night and day
One gave natural appreciation
And provided a safe place to sleep
Offered to help when I was in need
Was happy to prioritize issue resolution
It seemed I made them happy
Sort of like how they made me
But it's fascinating how people change
Or show true colours when shit gets crazy

Because the other was disconnected
Cared nothing for how I felt
Threw me in cold with no remorse
Left me alone with myself
Never showed me where I stand
Just let me fall to burning ground
Maybe if I laid their long enough
The perfect fix would be found
But problems got left in dark
Never addressed with any heart
Because issues they held inside
Only helped tear us apart
You can believe you're both working to fix things
And then just as soon as you start
Be told it's not enough
Because it's not worth going that far

And I just can't piece it together
No matter what I try
That process does not get better
The first person must have died
Or went missing to some place
That I was never going to find
Because they wouldn't have done me like that
They wouldn't have treated me so unkind
And I'm sure they believed in more for us
They worked as hard as I
They seen us shine at our best team efforts
They wouldn't have so easily said goodbye

See this person was a fighter
I knew what they'd survived
They went after what they wanted
They wouldn't have just not tried
A mindset I thought we shared
So I just can't accept they lied
I can't conclude they didn't care
I have to believe the first one died

And then somehow I ended up
With another to take their place
They appeared almost the same
With their sweet loving face
Over time I noticed difference
But they still filled the empty space
So I ignored unmutual interest
Emotion again gone to waste
Perhaps this is bitter reality
That I just don't want to taste
But they just can't be the same
The first person left without a trace

So for now I separate
Not knowing who is who
I have no grasp on what was lies
I don't even know what was true
I'm screaming to distinguish
Just want to open up my eyes
I wish to know just how it is
That I could fall for such a disguise
How could the one I thought I knew
Become someone I could not recognize?
I'll never know who I gave my heart to
And that's what I most despise