The Seventeen

Pataki talks about shrinking government
will he follow the G.W. Bush model
who added two departments of bueraucracy
the defense industry always to be caudled
bashes the Affordable Health Care Act as if it was something new
yet Truman circulated national health care years ago
doesn't offer a respectable alternative
that doesn't leave the less affluent with no dough

Paul's foreign policy I can relate to
stop sticking troops into every sordid act
but his domestic policy is for th birds
with no doubt a major step back
eliminate the Department of Education
who cares whites and blacks learn apart
no need to worry if a food product isn't safe
the good old marketplace will protect our hearts

Jindal loves to rail against the federal government
Obama and D.C. can do no right
unless Louisiana has a natural disaster
and the levees are getting tight
claims Democrats are good only at wasting money
a bias toward Reagan easy to see
the lengths he goes to appeal to the base
conveniently distort reality

Walker praises an energy policy
from any source power can flow
doesn't comfort me one bit
I have problems with children who because of radiation glow
since the nuclear sites will be privatized
and he hates unions with a zeal
don't think he will be first responder
if any accident ensues and radiation breaks a seal

Gilmore would bring German to the White House
a rare president fluent in another tongue
the odds are stacked against his late bid
some will even say far flung
loves the field of defense
forgetting the extent of Ike's plea
that a country taken hostage by the military industry
Is something the US should never be

Lindsay Graham sees himself as a foreign policy brain
but appears to have blinders on regarding excess
even detaining American citizens indefinitely
a noose on having freedom of press
no check on government behavior, constraining rights
a safeguard the Founding Fathers named
when it comes to executive versus congressional power
the White House should not tighten the chains

Kasich is an interesting fellow
for as a governor a problem was hiring people of my race
said he couldn't find any qualified
which meant black Republicans who knew their place
now he has the support of Charles Barkley
so for former bball players he won't have to scrounge
and instead confront that panacea of sin
elimate the hotbed of disruption, the teachers' lounge

Poor Christie he really can't help it
if in the White House tub like Taft he won't fit
hit a new low yelling at a little girl over climate change
showing why there are moments when it it is better to hush and sit
can't forget the exchange with the law student
Chris couldn't take it and threw a fit
said "when you conduct yourself like that in court
your rear end is going to be in jail you idiot"

Fiorina suggests all the problems
can be attributed to two sources
Obama or Clinton oh my
must be such evil forces
in her worldview anyone who opposes ISIL
is an ally and should be backed
even if they are wagging their own brand of terror
selective indignation a wrong way track

Now Rick Perry has a tendency to forget
his mouth is linked to the brain
saying the "BP oil spill was an act of God"
logic leaves like a runaway train
oh and how about "fighting a Revolution in the 16th. century
to get away from that onerous crown"
I feel certain he can get employment
make a splendid Barnum and Bailey clown

Carson before he was running said Obama
was going to to ignore the Constitution for a third term
despite his skill in the medical field
his statements about womens' health should make everyone squirm
or how about AP history classes
those words take the cake
"most people when they finish that course
are ready to sign up for ISIS", come on give me a break!

Bush is trying to outdo his brother
claims he is "a skeptic and not a scientist"
are we to be reassured that with his pedigree
a score of former presidential advisors will come with a flick of the wrist"
in the Washington Post he flatly declared we
"need immigrants because they're more fertile", is that right?
guess there is something in that genetic pool
giving those chromosomes added

Huckabee's rhetoric always astounds
like how "Obama is marching Israel to the door of the oven"
hard to have a civilized debate
when he throws out zingers by the dozen
or suggesting to prospective enlistees
the armed forces shouldn't be pursued
until Obama is out of the White House
the folksy former Arkansas governor borders on being crude

Santorum's version of Christianity knows no bounds
compared homosexuality to an act with a child or a dog
for a belief system based on compassion and love
his words do nothing to lift heavy fog
speaking of nature he determinedly refutes
a link to humans and climate change
by his thinking a scientist addressing warming
is utterly daft and deranged

Cruz claims the Iran deal will link us to terror groups
now shall we point out the irony
remember the US supported Hussein and Bin Laden in early times
pondering his goals causes much anxiety
says Reagan stood up to the Washington cartel
is that why government spendning increased
waste okay if it was in the military
defense contractors had a splendid feast

Rubio is bringing Nancy Reagan back in fashion
to the "evil" of marijuana just say "no"
just ignore the unjust sentencing practices
same crime but a face of color, we all know where they go
open the world to U.S. made products
unless a Cuban you happen to be
yeah those Commies will do in the states
must be the suppliers of so much misery

That leaves Donald Trump, the ultimate capitalist
frames all ideas on winners and those who lose
doesn't take criticism well
easily combative with the shortest fuse
subtance doesn't worry him at all
and the media gives him a pass
entertaining are his attacks
filled with a mixture of venom and sass

Seventeen elephants wanting to be president
with their rhetoric it won't be a bore
most playing off anger
into an open wound it is vinegar that they pour
content to trigger emotions accented by divisions
short term gain ruling their every deed
can we find a president appealing our decent motives
capitalism smock breeding oligarchy greed