Guin

Guin hails from the castle wall
But, alas, there's the moat to consider
Recently stocked with piranha and assorted reptiles
And again she has failed to lower her drawbridge
"Oh really?" she chirps, "Sorry sweets.
Whatever was I thinking?
My bad!"
So down it creaks and groans
Thunking into place on this side
Allowing entry at fucking last
But Guin blocks the way
"Where's my glorious Grail?" she demands.
"Cough it up, Sir Crow, or be gone
And never darken my drawbridge again"
"But I'm on bended knee!," I protest
"My chastity belt shall remain locked," she wails
"And my maidenhood inviolate
Until you deliver the tribute
That Grail clutched in your gauntlet
And then we'll pour the wine!"
"You don't come cheap," I sigh
"But your beauty, brains and breasts are priceless
And so my quest remains incomplete
But I shall return
Just keep it warm and wet my dearest"
"That I shall, Sir Crow, my champion, my gallant
You will have the honor of first crack"
Then off I ride, armor squealing
Knowing full well the risks
But cognizant of the reward
Guin more than justifies the means.