Going Down

 Ding Dong - Ground floor

Purgatory – All non lapsed Catholics
Please form and orderly queue
For self mutilation and torture
Suicide Bombers sorry we are out of virgins

Door Closing - Going Down

Ding Dong – Floor Minus 1
Atheists, agnostics, non believers
Lazy bastards, non-hackers
The proud and egotistical
Anyone who lied about their small penis
A large dark room
For you to reflect
On how stupid
You must feel

Door Closing - Going Down

Ding Dong - Floor Minus 2

Fans of Justine Beiber, One Direction.
Garth Brooks and anything by Cold Play
Fans of reality TV, followers of soap operas
Anyone who’s watched a full episode
Of the telli-tubbies or Power Rangers
Fans of Star Trek and anyone who has
Even tried to learn Klingon

Door Closing - Going Down

Ding Dong – Floor Minus 3

Politicians, estate agents, Lawyers
Sports stars, celebrities, salesmen,
Members of royal families,
Anyone who’s ever told a lie
Or like the above, been a liar for a living

Doors Closing

Ding Dong – Floor Minus 4

Conspiracy theorists, Scientologists
Freemasons, Golf and Country Club Members
Doctors, Consultants, Professors of any persuasion
Plastic Surgeons, Dentists and Therapists
Dr Phil, Jeremy Kyle and Oprah Winfrey

Door Closing - Going Down

Ding Dong – Floor Minus 5

Mormons and Latter Day Saints,
Jehovah’s Witnesses, Westborough Baptists
Any and all non-main stream religionists
Charity workers, charity givers and anyone
Who thinks Mother Theresa was not a crook

Door Closing - Going Down

Ding Dong – Floor Minus 6
Final and Bottom floor

Christians, Buddhists, Muslims
Hindus and anyone thinking
‘How the fuck did I end up here’
This is gonna be hard to take
But I’m afraid after all that’s gone before
The Jews were in fact God’s only
Chosen people