I'm a Creep

What you've heard may appeal to you
but don't believe the hype
For even though I'm well-equipped
I'm not the "boyfriend type"

But I could buy you candy bars
and give you lots of hugs
You could make me some sandwiches
and I could make you drugs

I'd write you lots of corny verse
that'd make you think I'm deep
You'd get to know me soon enough
and find out I'm a creep

I play a pretty mean guitar
and know some dirty jokes
I bet I could make you forget
that I'm completely broke

I'll work the blade from side to side
and watch your life-force squirt
Then I'll give it a twist or two
and ask you why it hurts