Harmony

I feel disconnected,
Ethereal?
As if I may be faded,
but not as in diminished.
Merely my tumultuous thoughts relinquished.
Not as if I were stuck in depression,
rather-
this is a calmness of Spirit.

I feel faded-
so lightly here and maybe there
at the same
time, and then I feel myself
breathe. Each breath,
my chest slowly rises and falls once more
beneath my chin, I feel it so steadily.

There is music in the background,
but I'm not quite hearing it-
no, I am listening,
but instead of focusing
I am witnessing it create environment
rather than one singular event.
A cacophony of sounds
one side is rough and agitated,
the other side too-
but of a different kind.
Rough nature, constant worry,
constant wind sounds- the sign of life
beyond my windows.

With the blinds wide open,
the sunlight is free to sweep in,
faded- not dark,
just light- gentle.
As if it wishes to say to me, "I'm here to be with you."

And its amazingly peaceful,
to feel so quiet-
to listen, but not quite hear.
In this case, hearing implies
I'd be singularly listening
not taking in everything
blocking other sounds out,
which is not what I am doing.
I can't, its so in tune, so perfect.
So unbroken,
by my own limited hearing.

This is what it is to be faded,
in a peaceful sense
as if the world were welcoming me back,
back into its beauty
of everything together

In its perfect, unaltered harmony.