something

Nothingness comes out of my words and thoughts
it hurts and feels like soil in my nose and mouth
all that i am comes up and it smells
something made me this way
since the moment i was born until now
it has been being built by life
i do not know from where does it come
i fear all that i do to my home
how did i become so selfish
how did i turn into myself
i have never wanted to hurt anyone
i gave it all i could to be good
i gave it everything to satisfy
i always end up starting fire
i always damage.
my mind
just my self
me
problem
all that i gave into good intentions
was never enough
the only way now is to leave
hide away so that i could not cause more pain
hide away into myself
for me to suffer myself
it is only my problem
only mine
no one else should taste me
no matter how i try
always end up bad
i gave everything to be good
all for you
not enough
somehow
keep it
inside
keep it
hidden
keep it
locked
fade away
disappear
sink
drown
fly back into the night
white rooms
no harm from me
to others
no more
no more
no more