That Sound

(the sound of a dying cats purr is one of the worst things I've ever heard)

I've never heard anything like it
It echoes off the walls of my heart
And bounces in to my mind, again... and again
This sound slashes, cuts right through
Pierces into me
Stabs
Filled with fear
Holding my chest
I can feel tears welling
The longer it persists
This blade locked in place
Unmovable by any force
Tears at me slowly
The longer I hear it
I'm feeling my insides rip out
Composure I had now sucked dry from my being
I am wet with tears
Soaked in the heartache of incoming loss
There is no fighting the absorption
And I am in pieces
Hanging by threads

A sound that should convey contentment
Only emits comfort
While the rest of its embodiment
Says 'I'm too weak to fight'
It's like the blissful feeling is gone
But the love is still alive
We're both living on love
You're surviving on it strong
And fighting for more
I know, I can feel it
And it's killing me
Because you've tried so hard
And it's just not fair

I'm glad I got to tell you everything
All I wanted you to know
And though maybe some part of me will always feel like I didn't do enough
I know I did my best and that's all I can do
I felt your appreciation and love reciprocated
Through the stillness you managed to respond
The cold could not take all the warmth you possess
And though you may be leaving physically
Your love is here to stay

I know now it's just a matter of time
I can't even explain how sure I feel
But the contact that we made
Communicated something to me
It told me this is where you want to be when you die
That you came here for this purpose
This spot isn't ideal, but you're comfortable
And that's all I care about
So you can just lay down
And relax the best you can
I hope you find peace
I'm glad we got to have you
And I am so grateful
That I got to remind you one last time how you're loved

The sound of faded purrs
Is one I'll never forget
Faded not in volume
But in quality and strength
It was loud in delivery
But certain properties had left
Indescribable
Almost unrecognizable
But just enough to assure me
That you were happy
And when you managed to look at me those few times
I knew you wanted me to know
And though I do
It hurts my heart so bad
Excruciating
To remember that sound
Of struggling to convey happiness