Self-Analysis

How much more can I do before I’m completely ruined
To become an artisan of such a craft takes time
How many more times can I poke, cut and poison my soul
Before I succumb to the consequences of my actions

How many times can I stare at myself in the mirror and say,
“This is the last time”, before I realize it’s all fucking lies
How many ways can I conceal myself behind dark layers
And pray that I can cover this ugliness that stains my face

How many punches can I receive before I fail to rise again
And finally find my places among the ashes of my past
How many more tears can I possibly cry before I drown
And sink further to the bottom of never ending despair

How many people can I lose, who choose to just walk away
Because I am a burden and had nothing to offer them to stay
How much longer can I silently grin and pretend to be happy
When I have so much anger and sadness ticking away inside

I am only human yet these emotions are far beyond comprehension
Something that cannot be justified through medication or meditation
I just wonder, how much longer can I go on….