deepundergroundpoetry.com
a land visited all too often
dark and shadowy abyss
feel the winds lonely kiss
a sense of fears embedded in the sky
of this land where angels dare not fly
the grass is swaying back and forth
the vast fields reaching outward north
see the horizon, wide and dark
a place where no adventurer would dare embark
no stars above, just an ashy gray
an unwelcoming sign of the lands dismay
a single twisted dead willow weeping
as a darkness starts creeping
feel the winds lonely kiss
a sense of fears embedded in the sky
of this land where angels dare not fly
the grass is swaying back and forth
the vast fields reaching outward north
see the horizon, wide and dark
a place where no adventurer would dare embark
no stars above, just an ashy gray
an unwelcoming sign of the lands dismay
a single twisted dead willow weeping
as a darkness starts creeping
Published 14th May 2011
| Edited 15th May 2011
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likes 6
reading list entries 3
comments 7
reads 1138
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
15th May 2011 00:46am
The 7 line has 2 ands . but besides that this is a good poem, would you mind if I wrote it down in my notebook.
15th May 2011 6:32am
19th May 2011 3:40am
nice and a good job with the rhyming.i had to stop and restart on some lines when i had a pace and then it changed.
a good write .
a good write .
20th Jun 2011 10:39pm
just a personal hint : your verse will probably develop better without searching for rhymes.
21st Jun 2011 6:20am
11th Jul 2011 2:28am
wonderful dalton as always and i honestly think it is easier to write with rhymes than not sooo yeah and again wonderful
14th Sep 2011 7:22pm
