Ageing Romeo

(A teenage girl’s advice to her divorced father)

You’re looking old and wrinkled your body’s very crinkled
The fairy with the ageing dust has been around and sprinkled
Everybody sniggers when you’re strutting in the town
There’s that ageing Romeo, oh what a silly clown

Don’t try to suck in yer belly in when a pretty girl goes by
You cause me such embarrassment I simply want to die
You look so ridiculous yer arse balloons and sags
Stuffed into those skin tight jeans instead of Oxford bags

Talk about ageing gracelessly, you look a proper fool
Swaggering into nightclubs trying to look cool
It’s no use dressing young dad my stern advice is sage
Stop combing over your bald patch and fer gord’s sake to act your age!