The Fight To Regain Self Freedom

Led in bed not much to be said
 except that I have a crooked nurse keeping me spoon fed on meds
 in the belly of a dank hospital bed.  
 
8 days no sleep,
one long journey praying defeat triggering a feirce paranoid burning.  
My body feeling near death as my soul leaks out to rest,
a hollow carcass still withered and battered,
the drug eats from the inside like a meat platter.  
 
On the left I watch as the morphine drips to keep me falling into the endless pits. Drained, strained and in pain,
I think back of what was gained....nothing but a shamed family name,
the guilt of oneself is too much to intake,
pointing blame like a coward but you know that in my brain it was me that is to feel punished and shamed.  
 
Though the evil still sits as the demon is not rid.
I think to myself 'let me survive and breach' ill shout out for all drug defeats,
rise up and refuse retreat for I will teach and let my voice preach.
Control this demon as I crave,
not let it beat me like a slave.
The mimd is strong and can lead me through this dark phase,
but once freedom is found there is no greater sound than the opening of the doors that trapped me like a starving hound.