storm front and cigarettes

Dampen the wildest part of yourself
self-destruction is not a mercy
love is not a drug
no matter how much
you want it to be

She doesnít love you
the words donít mean
what you want them to mean
and sex has never been on the table
not because you canít handle the intimacy
youíve just never offered yourself
up for that kind of sacrifice
tempting as it is

You smoke cigarettes
like theyíre not a noose around your throat
choking yourself from the inside out
you donít know how to feel alive anymore
and they give you something
to do with your hands

There are worse ways to hurt yourself than this
and youíre trying to avoid the fallout
among the heartbreak thatís surely coming
because sheís not like you
sheís out there fucking herself up
like itís something to live for
just like you used to do
before you discovered
drugs where an ocean
thatíd kill you just the same
if you chose to swim in them
on a stormy night

© Indie Adams 2014
Written by Indie (Miss Indie)
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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