Dirty Dishes

 Since you left to find yourself
I find the dirty dishes pile up.
I have also found that I have too many plates.
I can eat for over a fortnight
Without having to wash up,
or having to find the rubber gloves.

Have you found yourself yet?
Yesterday I went down to the basement.
It’s dirty, dank and dusty,
it reminded me of you.
I found another two dinner services.
Plates, bowls, cups and saucers,
I even found a matching teapot.
I was going to bring them upstairs.
In my head I heard the kitchen surface,
moan, groan and complain.
It sounded so much like you.

Is Jack still helping you to find yourself?
I found the bottle of shampoo you left,
L’oreal – because you’re worthless.
Still it was a worthwhile find
as I have run out of Squeezy.
I find that you can wash dishes
using shampoo and conditioner.
Works just the same, just less bubbles.


Have you or Jack actually found yourselves?
I find that reflection rather than fucking is a
more appropriate way to find oneself.
I have found that shampoo and conditioner
is no good for cleaning my shotgun.
I have found that my shotgun
solves my dirty dishes issue.
It also works a treat on pictures of you,
Pictures of us.
Finding my shotgun has now
Motivated me to find both of you.
It might be wise for both of you to
quickly lose yourselves instead.
I will find you, make no mistake
And when I do
There will be nothing
left for you both to find