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Honesty

Honestly.

It consists of being true to yourself, and those whom you love, deeply. There aren't any vacant rooms in one's psyche or heart for those who revel in the creation of illusions.

I never speak of love, if love isn't what I'm feeling.

However, knowing that a heart beats for you, and you alone, is a beautifully gripping but tragic thing, collectively. Loving someone so deeply that a certain fear emerges, over losing them.

I've bared witness to the unfolding that occurred within the heart of the one that captured my very heart & soul.

I watch him, as he watches me, intently.

He's a little rough around the edges, however, he's always been a gentleman to me. I've been nothing but difficult as I wasted my time plucking petals off his crazy daisy chain, whilst pondering... he loves me, he loves me not.

Depending upon his mood, and whether or not he's emptied his balls all over, only god knows who ?!

Our eyes tell a very different story, as does his lips, which possesses the letters of my name. He spells it out in black & white as he moves graciously upon the grey area between us.

However, he knows not how to enter my heart, entirely, just yet.

And so, I peek at him through the louvers as he waits upon the altar of our destiny, just as I've waited longingly upon his, for his love to grace me, in truth and honor.

There are no illusions as to the field upon which we each stand upon, whilst honoring the existence of one another.

He's mine. I'm His. And, that's all that we need to know, for now. I'm honored to be the object of his subtle but gentle affections as I channel my love & energy towards him, solely.

Sometimes, he's juxtaposed between phantasia, and reality. His mind deceives him, yet his emotions keep him aligned, in purity.

We both exist upon those planes, together, holding one anothers hand. Though, I'm afraid of his reflection shattering, right before my eyes. It's amazing to unearth a man below the surface, to know how delicate he really is.

However, the pain that grips my heart is knowing that our days are numbered. The overwhelming emotion of grief weighs heavily upon my mind as it tortures my heart, in an attempt to reconcile the love we made.

When you find the one that you're meant to embrace, there's no denying the emotions that flow, naturally. It's a natural flow.

Though, not everyone gets to savour those precious emotions, the kind that invade your every waking thought, and drives you slightly crazy.

The notion of love being a crazy thing, is true. Evidently.

I've learnt that love can be debilitating on my well being, if I can't reconcile my feelings. And, I'm counting down the days until I find what I've found, in him.

Soon.

Oceans apart... yet so close, in heart.