Understandably Unholy

I sit alone often, and find myself thinking.

I delve too deep into my inner, dark thoughts.

I have a serious case of limerence. And I don't handle it well.

I get over attached nearly immediately.

I find myself hating anyone that seems competition.

I've even quit talking to my best friend because of this.

And now, instead of laughing with him, I find myself imagining ways I could.... Eliminate him.

This goes for all people though. Not limiting to competition against my crush.

Including, but not limited to; friends, strangers, people who anger me.

I think it's a good thing I have video games as an outlet.

Otherwise I'd be down a dark road.

Slam his head against the corner of the brick wall. Let all these people watch as his blood and brains drip down.

Place him in front of a mirror, and make him watch as you cut him, and kill him.

So many dark thoughts, and as I sit in the dark, myself, I grin at them.

I feel myself losing it though.

Snap his neck now, it's okay.

I always have this little voice in my head, that occasionally slips a few words through my lips.

But I can't let them know. I refuse to go.