deepundergroundpoetry.com
Can't Have You
You're the very impersonation of a star
So very stunning and so very, very far
You're searching for a someone who just...isn't me
Looking for a woman, not someone boys call baby
I'm pain and lost love, yet I'm looking for someone too
I'm trying to be something other then blue
I want someone just or nearly like you
but we are just friends, we've only met a couple times
You don't even have a way of knowing all my crimes
How bitter I can be sometimes, how very cruel
And how often I have lost to love in a life's duel
You're searching for a perfectly sweet creature
But the though makes me want to scream "lech her"
I'm filled with dark thoughts about myself
And have problems with reality and wealth
I'm impatient and stubborn a lot of the time
I'm running from this very love crime
I just realized how much you've come to mean to me
And I just don't know what to do, you'd never want me
A messed up heart and a messed up mind
A messed up girl who can sometimes be unkind
But give me a chance and I'll prove my worth to you
But if you don't care and don't want me too
I'll be okay and I am sure to make it through
But you're the one who makes me feel unblue
(this is an old poem, it isn't recent)
So very stunning and so very, very far
You're searching for a someone who just...isn't me
Looking for a woman, not someone boys call baby
I'm pain and lost love, yet I'm looking for someone too
I'm trying to be something other then blue
I want someone just or nearly like you
but we are just friends, we've only met a couple times
You don't even have a way of knowing all my crimes
How bitter I can be sometimes, how very cruel
And how often I have lost to love in a life's duel
You're searching for a perfectly sweet creature
But the though makes me want to scream "lech her"
I'm filled with dark thoughts about myself
And have problems with reality and wealth
I'm impatient and stubborn a lot of the time
I'm running from this very love crime
I just realized how much you've come to mean to me
And I just don't know what to do, you'd never want me
A messed up heart and a messed up mind
A messed up girl who can sometimes be unkind
But give me a chance and I'll prove my worth to you
But if you don't care and don't want me too
I'll be okay and I am sure to make it through
But you're the one who makes me feel unblue
(this is an old poem, it isn't recent)
Published 11th Oct 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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The author encourages honest critique.
19th Oct 2014 8:59am
Your old work while revealing trepidation in emotions still has a steady, plow forward roll to it. Also, good polysyllabic rhymes. It's cool to see how far your work has evolved.
30th Oct 2014 6:33pm
I thank you for watching me grow in my poems. Now if only I can make myself distance form writing about love. It is my favorite topic but to grow I need to try more different things. Maybe I will try my hand at other styles and topics. :) Be sure to stay tuned, You might see different things coming form me :)
Part of growing into the kind of person who can roll with heart breaks and also actively search for love, balancing carnal needs against consistency, compassion and trust is of course learning to fully love yourself. It's both the best armor and the most magnetic attractor. Everyone digs someone who loves themselves and if you can be humble and know yourself fully? Judases and vutures can't take as much from you.
The secret to getting there fast is in your writing. On a psychological level the characters you play up in suspenseful situations reveal deep inner traits and desires. The way your succubus was handled by the demon-hunter comes to mind. On the first 3 levels it's hypnotic prose, steamy, heady, sexy until the twist that sticks in your gut. I laughed after I cringed at that one because it was like the author taking her tax for the words.
Loooots of amazing hidden talent in erotic horror, steampunk, and crime fiction is what glimmers from the corners of what you contribute to the universal creative pool.
On a spiritual level, you're a weaver spirit with a strong enough eagle totem it sounds off in your grrr's... So there's prolly a whole lot of voices waiting to tell their stories inside of you.
Good to grow.
Peace to our Beasts. May we write with even higher reach.
The secret to getting there fast is in your writing. On a psychological level the characters you play up in suspenseful situations reveal deep inner traits and desires. The way your succubus was handled by the demon-hunter comes to mind. On the first 3 levels it's hypnotic prose, steamy, heady, sexy until the twist that sticks in your gut. I laughed after I cringed at that one because it was like the author taking her tax for the words.
Loooots of amazing hidden talent in erotic horror, steampunk, and crime fiction is what glimmers from the corners of what you contribute to the universal creative pool.
On a spiritual level, you're a weaver spirit with a strong enough eagle totem it sounds off in your grrr's... So there's prolly a whole lot of voices waiting to tell their stories inside of you.
Good to grow.
Peace to our Beasts. May we write with even higher reach.
31st Oct 2014 5:49pm
