Nothing is easy: Why did you remind me?

Nothing is easy: Why did you remind me?

If I throw it away, does it matter?
All these years, did they matter?
If I let go, will it matter?
     I stand here on this never ending ladder
I wonder does it matter

Fight, fight, fight: I am tired, I am tired
Hit them; give them your best shot
I don’t know what I got

If I throw it away, will it be ok?
If I let go and say fuck it, would it matter either way?
     I am tired of dangling, on this
     Never ending ladder

A jump down, doesn’t seem too high from the ground
All these years did they matter?
All the sweat, all the tears
To end up just standing here

Mirrors, they shatter
Just don’t get to close
The walls are covered in them everywhere
I am dizzy standing here on this ladder

I will go, I am sorry: did I mention you?
No! I don’t think so
I’d rather swallow razors and choke on the blood, before
I call out to you
     This ladder is never ending
     Why am I just standing here?

The hero of this story, was dead a long time ago
I pretend to be alive: just to comfort you
I slipped down a few steps, I make mistakes
I always held you though
     Yet standing on this ladder, you shoved me
     Into the pit of hells fire

I don’t get it: I don’t get it
Why? When all I ever did was protect and support you
Its ok, I know when to walk away
I will let go… and jump the rest of the way

These goddamn mirrors
Fallow me, wherever I go
Be careful they shatter: don’t get to close
The walls are covered
I don’t know what to do

I am sorry, did I mention you?
No! I don’t think so
I’d rather swallow glass and rubble: choke on my red blood
Then to give you credit, for my sickness
     Standing on this never ending ladder
     It doesn’t look so far from the ground

Angels, were did you go?
I really use to believe in you: now I just don’t know
     Words cut deep, I guess you already know: that’s why you said those things to me
     Why didn’t you save me?
You watched: I know you did
I seen you laughing
     I am jumping, off this never ending ladder
     I am not too high from the ground: it will only hurt a little
Angels under fire and brimstone
I laid shattered and broken… in the snow
Was it easier to pretend you didn’t know?

I am angry, I am pissed, I am on fire
I want to hurt you, and I know how to
I could destroy you, and leave you shattered in the grove: like you left me
But I am better than that you see
     I jumped from the ladder
     It only hurts a bit, nothing like all the others

Angels, you left me by myself
Why did you leave me alone?
Where did you fucking go?
Maybe you found a better mother fucking show
How the hell am I supposed to no?

I laid there; I cried there, I waited there
To be rescued: in that god forsaking red stained snow

Angels under brimstone
Hells fire, evil lust, angry desires
Burning deep in my red blood
You left me behind; alone for dead

Lori