Can't Spell

You make me feel like my insecurities can't ruin an experience
And I'm not sure how to handle that

You seem to be confident in how I feel in moments
And that the after effects will fade in time

According to you my feelings shine clear through inner glimpses of me
Stuff I never try nor intend to show

I don't know how you have a hold of what I'm barely grasping
But somehow you're sure that my revelations are a good thing

I'd love to flood with doubt but you counteract it with mutuality
It's not hard to say we're equal on what we give and get

Then later when I tell you I'm worried and scared for what lies ahead
You offer me a mixture of reassurance, understanding and certainty

And when my apprehension goes in circles you still stick around
Never displaying frustration, only patience and determination to help

You're going to go crazy if you keep this behaviour up
Yet you seem to think it's worth it because you can see the payoff

But it shouldn't have to take that amount of effort to reach progress
Still for some reason you're willing to take as much time as required

I can't help but feel like you might be wasting more than you spend
Yeah I know, you'd disagree because I've pretty much went there already

I just don't want you to have to deal with anything unnecessary you don't need
But I know it's your choice so I'm respecting your decision

I can express my appreciation and thanks many times over
But none of that can truly convey the extent to which it goes

In this case I wish I could translate the language of this depth
Because this amount of gratitude is something you deserve to know

And though it feels like nothing I've done or said is really enough
I don't have much more than that so all I can do is hope

Maybe I'll find a way one day to do something for you of similar meaning
Where I can spell it out to you the way words and small glimpses just won't