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It's Friday

It’s Friday:
I can’t explain this feeling, am I empty, am I self-doubting, am I doubting me
Why not talk to me on Friday, every week it never fails, is he avoiding me
The truth, is there something I need to know, about you
Am I being naïve, is it my weakness and trust that he is playing
I just cannot explain this thing
Why does it matter, this is pathetic of me, I am not above wondering
But to not understand, this is bewildering to me
He has so much he does, so much he is doing, and he just really is very busy
If I was his love, and he loved me, then wouldn’t he make time, just a little for me?
Am I a fool, am I a fool hiding from the truth, I am too much for this misunderstanding
Why did I do this, it doesn’t make any sense, I am confined to only him why did I do this
For a word and maybe a dream, am I just growing too old am I scared to be alone
Was I lying to me, when I said I like my freedom?
No, I wasn’t lying, I don’t know what I was thinking, I do know I got me, I trust me, I got this
I was down, but not long, I remember and I need, to be true to only me, just me
I pushed many good men away, and I guess that is ok, because I got to get back to basics
And in this I am me
I am not so pathetic, because I can take back what belongs to me, I am strong and I am me
I was giving too much to quickly, I no to go slow, and move the same way, I no to watch the signs, and read the righting, I know not to play games, but men can play them with me all day because I will not fall, and maybe that is why this happened, it was a test to see, Oh I hate test but I do not fail them, I may miss something, but I get it in the end, and I win, I don’t lose, I don’t cry, but I did, I did for you, and now I know it could happen to me,
It is not too late to take back what belongs to me, my heart is my own, and my body is mine,
And my soul is mine, and my mind well it is mine, and you are a man I might chose to love
Someday, your words might be slick but I don’t think everything is the way you said, it doesn’t
Feel right, it just doesn’t feel right to me, and I have survived this long listening to me, and I
Have made it this far without the dying from the agony of a broken heart, I am really sorry if I
Am wrong, but I don’t think that I am, I think you tell me what you want me to no, I think you
Hide your true self from me so I cannot see, and the funny thing is I would have loved you more
If you were honest about your feelings, I would have accepted anything but you never talk to
Me on Fridays, you tell me you’re very busy I get a bit of your time when you’re working, but it
Just doesn’t add up to be much of anything, if you were only using me I would have been ok, if
You just fucking told me, now I feel betrayed, you said you like my kind of crazy, you have never
Seen all that I can be, I am not your fool you should have been truthful, men are a million a
Penny I gave too much to fast, I didn’t take time to think, thank you, thank you for giving me
Fridays, today without you, lets me see the pathetic truth, I was just a dumb ass fool, but I
Cannot do this anymore for you
Seascape
Written by seascape
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