deepundergroundpoetry.com

Happy

When was this last time I felt this way?
So elated that I could burst with joy.
So hungover from the excitment of today.
Seeing a friend for the first time in months.
Being with my boyfriend.
Showing off my son.
Not arguing with my mother.
Going out to eat with my family.
Knowing how to write again.
It's like I can finally breathe.
It's a sweet sigh of relief as my depression finally fades.
Mania descends upon me now and hopefully it'll stay.
Hyper, overjoyed-- So many new ideas, bubbling around in my head.
I'm ready to make my story make sense.
I'm ready to dream.
I'm ready to write.
I'm ready to be. . .

Happy?

Yes indeed, that is what I'm feeling right now.

Overjoyed.
Emotional.
Inspired.
Delighted.

No, no, no-- I'm still not saying it correctly.
It's been so long that I've forgotten how to explain this emotion.
But here it is, loud and clear.
Bright and proud.
In your face.
Ask no questions.

Bright like the sun high in the sky.
Christmas lights against the snow on a wintery night.
Fireworks on the fourth of July.
I could go on. . .

But I won't, cause what I'm trying to say.

What I'm really trying to say.
Is that I am. . .

Happy.

For the first time in a long time. . .

I am happy.

And it just feels good to be. . .

Feels good to be happy.
And for the first time in a long time, happy to be me.