WORN

Post modern love poem with a hint of romance, a moon beam shining over a dark alley...

Thanks Mourganna this criticism is much appreciated, thank you for your appreciation of the work

Beautifully written

Hey thanks Rose for the comment - it's great to see u here

XD

great images and a happy ending,
what more could I want..:)

Ha ha - mate you're always welcome here!

urban tragedy, yet romantic. I see a fallen knight drawn to a divine light...

Thanks again John
And so anon
With your kind words
I carry on

Tragic but not without a hint of irony. I love the unexpected happy ending :-).

aye miss Chi in the midst of despair there can come that moment when you catch yourself in the act of depression stumbling like a clown - playing a part - waiting in the wings for a better role to play!

Worn and torn,ripped...ended on a soothing note. (nice read)

Thanks Hashman - really cool u stopped by:)

Beautiful

Thank you - truly beautiful seen through the eyes of grace :)

Whale

I especially like the opening couple of lines but the whole write has a great feel / flow about it. I s'pose if there was anything at all that seemed a bit out of place (to me) it would be the fourth line, seems to break the continuity of the previous few, I'm not sure why exactly, could be feeding clashes with the past tense, maybe try 'who fed' or some such wording that would bring that line into the past.

either way, a decent offering good fellow

good stuff

That's great Craic - I've gone back and forth with feeding and fed to - and left to create distance with the third line - much appreciated.

Very expressive. Great job!
-Lissie

Thanks Lissie - very much appreciated

They have said it all ...
#bows# ... Beautiful...

Hey Lee - thanks - I've been travelling and it was cool to read at my journeys' end

"when my heart was dishwater
rolling rock dust and powder"

Damn. That makes my poets ribs hurt. Well wrought.

So glad to felt it gold
Come by anytime:)

When your weary soul has got tired of it all: the pains and suffering caused by past love, it's good to know that you find love in the end...bittersweet it is!

[rain drips my bath water fell from the awnings]
"drips" contradicts with "fell" in terms of tense

Over-all, well done...

@EngrVV

Cool comments :) thank you for stopping by.
Here "rain drips" nouned.

Then we call it raindrops...well, you can call it anyway you want. I'm just a lousy bystander (LOL)...

:)

At your world's end but love smiles once again on you brining hope with it. Enjoyed.

:) yes friend if u look hard enough it's there - somewhere!

I have always wondered if this
is truth.. .just when it seems we
have had enough, that's when
love come & mean true love come
knocking on doors..

Hmm, well I'm pass worn & am
awaiting, better yet a bit sleepy
feeling as well.lol.. No but
honestly just always been curious
of..

Lovely & delicate, a portion of
my heart can relate.. .it aches
merely reading this..

-Howlings

Sometimes it does - and it did for me and I watched her sleep as I wrote these words

Cheers bro

This is creative but retains a grounded, earthy sense in its images. It touched me.

Thanks DC