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deepundergroundpoetry.com
One More Night
Shall we pretend this is our last evening
we scored, hocking the diamond huggies
your old man bought on your sixteenth
the day you were old enough to get pierced
and secretly tattooed on the cusp of your breast.
Shall we make out like this is our first kiss
when you lit me up and inhaled my breath
melted my pipe dreams with impassive eyes
the bitter taste of resin on your lips and whispers
of dragon tales that I’m the best hit you’ve ever had.
Shall we fake it as if you’re still a virgin
like your daddy never laid a hand on you.
You’re gone and I landed after you stopped breathing
holding you like a stillborn… because nobody’s
going to take my baby away from me.
This poem was written for the "Shall We" comp.
Published 13th Apr 2014
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 1
comments 10
reads 1322
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
13th Apr 2014 11:08pm
23rd Apr 2014 4:26pm
I'm stoked you found the beauty in this dark love drug poem, it's a bit modern-day Romeo and Juliet thinking about it now. Thanks heaps, Crim for your continual support, much appreciated.
14th Apr 2014 8:28pm
23rd Apr 2014 4:27pm
Anonymous
16th Apr 2014 4:50pm
This poem is a good envision of what addiction can be like. Always the one more time and that the once might be best or better than before.
One more night in paradise....one last time
One more night in paradise....one last time
It almost sounds like a desperate love poem when you put it that way. Chasing the dragon is the phrase that inspired this poem. Thanks for your for great comment, Le Fay.
21st Apr 2014 2:28pm
The piece encapsulates so much of her pain and angst without overselling the reality of her situation ...
It's interesting you write about her selling her diamonds from daddy because heroin use is on the rise among privileged teens in my neck of the woods ...
Insightful ink!
It's interesting you write about her selling her diamonds from daddy because heroin use is on the rise among privileged teens in my neck of the woods ...
Insightful ink!
23rd Apr 2014 10:10pm
Drug addiction doesn't discriminate. I've seen drugs ruin friends lives from both poor and well off families, from good homes and broken homes. I've watched mates go through their parent's house looking for stuff to hock for drugs. Drug addiction is selfish, but it ruins families not just an individual.
The Australian film Candy with Heath Ledger, is a profound love story about drug addiction that's definitely worth checking out.
Thanks for the great comment LSP.
The Australian film Candy with Heath Ledger, is a profound love story about drug addiction that's definitely worth checking out.
Thanks for the great comment LSP.
9th Jun 2014 5:22am
You're an excellent poet.
"the bitter taste of resin on your lips and whispers of dragon tales that I’m the best hit you’ve ever had." -- Dope shit man.
"the bitter taste of resin on your lips and whispers of dragon tales that I’m the best hit you’ve ever had." -- Dope shit man.
28th Aug 2015 7:15pm
Revisiting this through the competition I can't but help think of three cousins of mine ... One hooked on "the glass dick" real bad. At one point or another they've all come into cash from lawsuits ranging from $10,000 to most recently just under one million. That mill will be gone within a year - two tops ... that or he'll be found dead and bloodied because he wanted "One More Night"
Masterful piece.
Masterful piece.
