Goodbye Drips from Your Lips

How can I explain without offending you?
I want to be alone in a place you will not go
Somewhere you cannot see or hear me
I just want you as far away from me as possible
So long as I suffer the life I experience
Inside
I feel as though I will soon explode
And I don’t want you to get caught in the fall-out
Of my demise, and the icicles that fall from my sky
That I was holding in dungeons dug deep
To keep hidden what I was forbidden to expose
That I had no power to conceal when speaking to your eyes
Or typing softly in your ear what you did not want to hear
Once or twice or fifteen times in your silent absence
I am always alone surrounded by cold cement walls
With windows too high to see outside
Under dripping storm-pipes where water pools
Like tears of sorrow that fall from eyes that cannot see
The smile that never embraces your exquisite lips
While words that burst like fireworks
Make their way through my dying brain
Where they also die in sparkling darkness
As gray becomes black so bright it burns your breath
Each time you speak of what I can never feel
And the movement I see dancing on your lips
Is merely my imagination hoping to witness you smile
A gift I would give you if it cost me my mind
But instead I saw them whisper to my eyes, “goodbye”