Changing my mind

I look at my wrists
I know I could
Leave here for bliss
But I can't stand blood

To many pills
Just make me feel sick
And alcohol spills
Turns me to a dick

Tall buildings are great
I could start my flight
But not in this state
I'm to scared of heights

Jump under a lorry
Be flattened and squished
I'm bound to be sorry
With my luck I'd miss


A noose round the neck
Would leave me cold
I'd just cause a wreck
Cos the ceiling won't hold

A knife or a gun  
Would leave me empowered
The truth of it all
I'm a bloody great coward
   
   Or am I

With everything wrong
Nothings gone right
Been like this so long
I'm drained from the fight

I'll be beaten some more
But I'm not giving in
One things for sure
The bastards won't win!!!