Wishes

i wish i could call you
right now
at 12:06am

i could sneak out the back window
so the door doesn't beep

i would meet you out front
by your white car
and together we would drive

we could go to minellas for awhile
diner food helps calm the nerves

we wouldn't ever talk
about what we wanted to
or what we thought

we would just sit there
and play it out in our heads

probably order some milkshakes
mine strawberry, yours vanilla

and look at each other
hoping that the other person
wasn't thinking about them

i hoping that you weren't thinking about leaving me
you hoping that i was thinking about missing you

we wouldn't talk
pay in silence
sliding the money across the counter

drive through town
the traffic lights waking up the car

one of us would yawn
then the other
contagious

stopping
to try and grab the memory
as it slowly wriggled out of our grasp

next year would be so different
it hurt to think about it

watching a piece of myself
my heart drive away in a white car
to a rainy city far away from my eyes
only a desperate screen
connecting us at the finger tips
we would try

but i'm not sure if we will succeed.