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Hollow Man
Hollow Man
I had a talk with my soul one day, he told me he's in pain, that things I've been doing are driving him insane.
He begged and pleaded, sobbed and grovelled and used myself against me, he railed at the bars of his fleshy jail until I agreed to get over my soulful greed and let him step out for air.
That glittery bastard ripped his way out, went through the door and never looked back.
Now I'm stuck with a gaping wound, a blood rimmed abyss that forms my core. We still have a bond, that shiny bastard and me, and I'll do whatever it takes to feed his wandering curiosity.
If he feels what i feel, let him feel what it's like to wrap your hands around a neck and look into eyes while the light dies. Let him hear the screams of women and children as they part ways with their skin, let him see what they think as they think of me and him while I scalp them.
I hope he enjoys the feel of an eye for an eye and the feeling of a gouged out eye in my closing fist. I tried and i tried, and now I've finally ruined him.
That once bright shiny bastard who'd thought he'd gotten away. Just look and see how much that one betrayal cost him. His former silvery self now forgotten as he sits in his own spluttering, feeble light and struggles to forget the end of what he started.
I had a talk with my soul one day, he told me he's in pain, that things I've been doing are driving him insane.
He begged and pleaded, sobbed and grovelled and used myself against me, he railed at the bars of his fleshy jail until I agreed to get over my soulful greed and let him step out for air.
That glittery bastard ripped his way out, went through the door and never looked back.
Now I'm stuck with a gaping wound, a blood rimmed abyss that forms my core. We still have a bond, that shiny bastard and me, and I'll do whatever it takes to feed his wandering curiosity.
If he feels what i feel, let him feel what it's like to wrap your hands around a neck and look into eyes while the light dies. Let him hear the screams of women and children as they part ways with their skin, let him see what they think as they think of me and him while I scalp them.
I hope he enjoys the feel of an eye for an eye and the feeling of a gouged out eye in my closing fist. I tried and i tried, and now I've finally ruined him.
That once bright shiny bastard who'd thought he'd gotten away. Just look and see how much that one betrayal cost him. His former silvery self now forgotten as he sits in his own spluttering, feeble light and struggles to forget the end of what he started.
Published 6th Jul 2013
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6th Jul 2013 3:13am
Anonymous
20th Jul 2013 5:41am
1. Great use of imagery
2. "Let him" anaphora is powerful
3. Interesting structure
I just have one suggestion...more like a personal request...I would like to see how you would take your words and formulate them into stanzas...that would be a real interesting structure to see how you would organize your piece "Hollow Man."
2. "Let him" anaphora is powerful
3. Interesting structure
I just have one suggestion...more like a personal request...I would like to see how you would take your words and formulate them into stanzas...that would be a real interesting structure to see how you would organize your piece "Hollow Man."
