The Disenchanted Heart Wears A Hoodie

The shadow spoke to me
although I do not know what was said
I imagine the words meant something
or at least they should've.

I am captured
images from the past shackle me to
the wall of unforgiveness
here I bleed, internally, forever

tears roll down sallow cheeks,
water like a funeral procession
I find convenience in the release
well at least I think I do

the worn feelings of a deviant love
haunt and chill the bones of what is left
goose bumps are for amateurs
I let it caress my soul

opening my arms but not my heart
the gateway to oblivion has been unlocked
I peek my head in
looking around I decide this isn't the place for me

chances are,
I'll be back to take another glance
in the darkest of hells which hides inside,
I wait almost breathlessly for that moment to arise again

the light hurts my eyes,
I force myself to look
I am always forcing myself
why must my brain and body be at war

torn apart by a restless mind
one that refuses to sleep,
held together by pieces of a lost soul
one which I do not believe to be mine

I actually watch life go by
thinking about everything
dissecting it
killing the simple beauty of what is natural.

Oh little jaded one pull it together
light, dark, light and dark
who the fuck cares,
contrasts baby contrasts.