deepundergroundpoetry.com
Tempo
A period in my career-
When all went well,
A thousand fireflies paved my way.
A period in my career-
When everything is dull,
An ant bite injected severe venom.
It’s all about time-
That chalks my temperament,
That decides my tempo.
When all went well,
A thousand fireflies paved my way.
A period in my career-
When everything is dull,
An ant bite injected severe venom.
It’s all about time-
That chalks my temperament,
That decides my tempo.
Published 14th Oct 2010
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 0
reading list entries 0
comments 6
reads 1070
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
that last verse gets me. i love that all the last words in the verse begin with "t".. i don't know if you meant to do it, but it puts a "t, t, t" like a clock ticking (for time), or a metronome clicking (for tempo) right to the end of the verse. and the message just makes so much sense and flows so well. fantastic indeed! [:
14th Oct 2010 10:32am
Of late time has been much more a dominating factor to me, and in the latest of my compositions I have acknowledged that. However, the t t t trio has been your inference and discovery and I am too glad to have it in this way. Thank you very much that you have enjoyed it in this way. Thanks for reading.
Anonymous
15th Oct 2010 00:49am
This is wonderful. My favourite is the first. The fireflies image was orgasmically good. Write on Anando. Your short verses are genius.
15th Oct 2010 12:09pm
It's always great to have comments like this from you Jack. I am relieved you enjoyed this.
16th Oct 2010 4:53pm
29th Nov 2011 7:30pm
The phrase, "a period in my career" is a strong one to repeat. It's interesting, open, and solid. Hold onto it for revisions.
