Close Your Eyes Kids

People have made money on documenting
the differences between the genders regarding brains
to read and use them all would drive anyone insane

I spied a couple courting in a dinner the other day
a meeting of the minds wasn't at hand
he was polite maybe to fault
and it seemed she had other plans

She was tired of roses and perfumes
lavishing her with bling
said she want to be pure freak
kept on talking about "that thing"

We talked at the bar after she stormed out
he was puzzled and very distraught
we tried to solve this predicament
was it just bad luck that he caught?

In our drunken state we crafted a plan
to show another side of his ardor
never believing when he was sobered up
he would remember what our talk was for

Well I'll be darned he implemented our agenda
didn't go as well as hoped
nose troubled neighbors impeded the tryst
called the police to have them cope

So let this be a lesson
before your sexual dalliances get out of hand
make sure when you try to impress
your "love zone" is fully in your command

Because it seems violence is tolerated
even cartoons boast the stuff
puritanical at least in this nation
about people simply being in the buff