Submissions by pretty_normal (Pretty Normal)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
DARK POEM
Published
15th Apr 2014 1:22am
15th Apr 2014 1:22am
My own stability is fleeting
Take the muscle I'm just bones
no way to move, not even frown
I'm a pot of fucking ice-cream
and you spooned right from the centre
cause there's the definite feeling
of something having been gauged out
then I remind myself I'm 6 months on from all that bullshit
so why is nothing any easier
I struggle not to hate you
because if this isn't hate then why do I continue to care at all?
I'd hate to see you at work, but I'd love it all the same
I miss you in so many ways
but I hate myself for saying so
as my persistence will not pay...
no way to move, not even frown
I'm a pot of fucking ice-cream
and you spooned right from the centre
cause there's the definite feeling
of something having been gauged out
then I remind myself I'm 6 months on from all that bullshit
so why is nothing any easier
I struggle not to hate you
because if this isn't hate then why do I continue to care at all?
I'd hate to see you at work, but I'd love it all the same
I miss you in so many ways
but I hate myself for saying so
as my persistence will not pay...
704 reads
2 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
31st Mar 2014 10:44pm
31st Mar 2014 10:44pm
I don't dream and I don't need to
I do(n't) want you to know yet(/already)
so please don't (over)react
I've found comfort in my bumpy arms
reminding me that my prison is lined
with wood-chip walls
no words
no one speaks in here
and even less does anyone listen.
"Sleep is for the weak"
but to be weak was to be protected
and I think sometimes,
'oh how people cared
even enough to make my loneliness feel momentary
and to split seconds into understanding love
and incapacitating myself with it'
I...
so please don't (over)react
I've found comfort in my bumpy arms
reminding me that my prison is lined
with wood-chip walls
no words
no one speaks in here
and even less does anyone listen.
"Sleep is for the weak"
but to be weak was to be protected
and I think sometimes,
'oh how people cared
even enough to make my loneliness feel momentary
and to split seconds into understanding love
and incapacitating myself with it'
I...
661 reads
1 Comment
DARK POEM
Published
12th Mar 2014 00:16am
12th Mar 2014 00:16am
Glamorizing Suicide
I can sit here needlessly wanting you
while I also want to trace my veins with a knife
tiny porcelain hairs on the tops of my thighs
engraving sensory ducts
I hope to feel again.
Oh bitter-sweet
my sweet tooth never understood fully
what it meant to bite too hard into
something sour enough to make you want to kill you.
And dead skin sits under my nails
trinkets and bloody bracelets
glamorize
fantasize
really there's some anti-bac
hair scrunchies covered in blood
a pot of sudocrem, 2 paracetamol
plasters, long or...
while I also want to trace my veins with a knife
tiny porcelain hairs on the tops of my thighs
engraving sensory ducts
I hope to feel again.
Oh bitter-sweet
my sweet tooth never understood fully
what it meant to bite too hard into
something sour enough to make you want to kill you.
And dead skin sits under my nails
trinkets and bloody bracelets
glamorize
fantasize
really there's some anti-bac
hair scrunchies covered in blood
a pot of sudocrem, 2 paracetamol
plasters, long or...
646 reads
2 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
2nd Mar 2014 5:21pm
2nd Mar 2014 5:21pm
When you're numb you long to feel
you're best left unfeeling
but it kills you whether you choose to or not
numbness slowly feeds till you're all over cold
can lie on the floor of your hallway
screaming
and feel like you're falling
off 4 story buildings
when in reality you
already
fell.
feelings are sharp
they're inconsistant
but reduce you to behaving incapably
so inescapably
one offers the highs, giving you further to fall and more bones to break
while one's grinding away at the cartilage slowly
it's a grisly business
but either...
but it kills you whether you choose to or not
numbness slowly feeds till you're all over cold
can lie on the floor of your hallway
screaming
and feel like you're falling
off 4 story buildings
when in reality you
already
fell.
feelings are sharp
they're inconsistant
but reduce you to behaving incapably
so inescapably
one offers the highs, giving you further to fall and more bones to break
while one's grinding away at the cartilage slowly
it's a grisly business
but either...
724 reads
1 Comment
DARK POEM
Published
2nd Feb 2014 10:34pm
2nd Feb 2014 10:34pm
Circles
My shirt just hangs
a broken body bends
there's paper and clothes and plaster wrappings
a jiffy bag
nothing inside.
I'll use my new Dictaphone
and see if I can capture for once
all the tiny sounds that scratch at my skull
bring tears to my eyes, then dull
I've become numbing
I can't paint in blood
even if I'm drowning in it
there's water and a paintbrush
but the paint blots
and smudges
its good for nothing
maybe it was better off inside.
This is infinity
boundless, treacherous
endless...
a broken body bends
there's paper and clothes and plaster wrappings
a jiffy bag
nothing inside.
I'll use my new Dictaphone
and see if I can capture for once
all the tiny sounds that scratch at my skull
bring tears to my eyes, then dull
I've become numbing
I can't paint in blood
even if I'm drowning in it
there's water and a paintbrush
but the paint blots
and smudges
its good for nothing
maybe it was better off inside.
This is infinity
boundless, treacherous
endless...
624 reads
0 Comments
DARK POEM
Published
15th Jan 2014 10:52pm
15th Jan 2014 10:52pm
Never known this before
There's nothing to say what can I tell you
that I didn't already wish you knew
nothing great here
I'm feeling everything and it all hurts
there's no respite from thoughts
just guilt
which turns to hating yourself
and loving the parts of you that hate yourself because you know that they're all so lonely.
Everything I had that could have killed me
has turned all at once
and clearly there was a jam or everything got stuck
somewhere
because this equilibrium
isn't fun
and I'm hanging in ways I've never known
and never wanted to...
that I didn't already wish you knew
nothing great here
I'm feeling everything and it all hurts
there's no respite from thoughts
just guilt
which turns to hating yourself
and loving the parts of you that hate yourself because you know that they're all so lonely.
Everything I had that could have killed me
has turned all at once
and clearly there was a jam or everything got stuck
somewhere
because this equilibrium
isn't fun
and I'm hanging in ways I've never known
and never wanted to...
614 reads
1 Comment
SELF POEM
Published
17th Dec 2013 10:52pm
17th Dec 2013 10:52pm
Don't tempt me I'm already shaking
"I need you to keep myself vaguely anything
whereas you're vaguely whole anyway"
Did you misread or I misinterpret
there's soars on my back and eyes on my feet
except the likelihood remains
it's an itchy kick from five thousand thoughts
sitting inside
tiny knives
looking to open me up from the inside
succeeding evermore there's a gap full of fairy dust
or dust all the same
but it must be magic
as I only occasionally feel pain
concepts sliding down my throat on scrubbing brushes and scouring pads
my words get...
whereas you're vaguely whole anyway"
Did you misread or I misinterpret
there's soars on my back and eyes on my feet
except the likelihood remains
it's an itchy kick from five thousand thoughts
sitting inside
tiny knives
looking to open me up from the inside
succeeding evermore there's a gap full of fairy dust
or dust all the same
but it must be magic
as I only occasionally feel pain
concepts sliding down my throat on scrubbing brushes and scouring pads
my words get...
589 reads
1 Comment
ANGER POEM
Published
17th Dec 2013 10:36pm
17th Dec 2013 10:36pm
I wouldn't come back
There's clumps of your blonde hair
but did you tear them out or have I
and I'm sorry that there's nothing to say
except I'm not and I won't say that either
I wouldn't care about times or places
if you had
sentiment means nothing if you're not sentimental back
you don't deserve anything
recognition, discussion or apprehension
I'll be angry for as long as it takes
to take back all those parts of me
there are secret valleys between my nose and my eyes
where I see
lying on my side
and the salt drips from my...
but did you tear them out or have I
and I'm sorry that there's nothing to say
except I'm not and I won't say that either
I wouldn't care about times or places
if you had
sentiment means nothing if you're not sentimental back
you don't deserve anything
recognition, discussion or apprehension
I'll be angry for as long as it takes
to take back all those parts of me
there are secret valleys between my nose and my eyes
where I see
lying on my side
and the salt drips from my...
641 reads
0 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
6th Dec 2013 5:39pm
6th Dec 2013 5:39pm
I don't see dirt
being something my mind blanks
I find it difficult to remember your
there's solidarity in independence
but it only ever came from
waking up doesn't carry that pitch-less gaping cleft
anymore
but I remember having something to wake up for
"why are you doing this"
it's easiest to forget the words that made you in one
everything you despise
everything I despise
Didn't care at the time
but you're no
prize. Except you are
there's raindrops on the hood of our car.
...
I find it difficult to remember your
there's solidarity in independence
but it only ever came from
waking up doesn't carry that pitch-less gaping cleft
anymore
but I remember having something to wake up for
"why are you doing this"
it's easiest to forget the words that made you in one
everything you despise
everything I despise
Didn't care at the time
but you're no
prize. Except you are
there's raindrops on the hood of our car.
...
661 reads
2 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
24th Nov 2013 8:43pm
24th Nov 2013 8:43pm
Persistence Doesn't Pay Off
Clearly I'm fickle
and I infatuate
in the hope that something
somewhere
will reciprocate.
I'm the same
but I force away remembering myself like this before.
If I'm not in pain, or out of pain then what am I
floating is inaccurate
there's a gap in existence somewhere
that only I know of
and it's there that I'm sinking
through mud and twigs
to get further into my own sense
of nothing
of no one
and of everything
I've been afraid of hurting me
as it all hurt
and these new bones i'm quite fond...
and I infatuate
in the hope that something
somewhere
will reciprocate.
I'm the same
but I force away remembering myself like this before.
If I'm not in pain, or out of pain then what am I
floating is inaccurate
there's a gap in existence somewhere
that only I know of
and it's there that I'm sinking
through mud and twigs
to get further into my own sense
of nothing
of no one
and of everything
I've been afraid of hurting me
as it all hurt
and these new bones i'm quite fond...
692 reads
3 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
18th Nov 2013 9:59pm
18th Nov 2013 9:59pm
It's Only Getting Later
There's this thing when I drive
and I don't know whether to be scared
but there's smoke at the side of the road
and it's always fucking there.
Whoever you are I'm not afraid
but this isn't a 'Dita' situation
we weren't meant to be
I'm not made.
It feels like death
but who can be sure
condensation's running away from something
and steam never touches the floor
nothing's perfect
and wow
I used H2O to prove that point
Blood is thicker than water
but I don't want to be dirty I need to shower...
and I don't know whether to be scared
but there's smoke at the side of the road
and it's always fucking there.
Whoever you are I'm not afraid
but this isn't a 'Dita' situation
we weren't meant to be
I'm not made.
It feels like death
but who can be sure
condensation's running away from something
and steam never touches the floor
nothing's perfect
and wow
I used H2O to prove that point
Blood is thicker than water
but I don't want to be dirty I need to shower...
625 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by pretty_normal (Pretty Normal)
