Submissions by miseryomy
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Anxiety (mental games)
Nearly 48 hours now and still wide awake
Exhausted, depressed, the anxiety over takes
Thoughts racing, blurring, spiraling out of control
Wishing for some weed, I'm at ease when I'm stoned
Music fills my ears but its not what's playing on the radio
Am I lost? Here, over there, what is this show
Sleep deprived, shaky, in a dream like state
Nervous, manic looking for someone to relate
Should I call in to life and take this crazy day off
Blurry eyes, hair stands on end I'm here but lost
Almost tripping, yet I have had no drugs to try
So...
Exhausted, depressed, the anxiety over takes
Thoughts racing, blurring, spiraling out of control
Wishing for some weed, I'm at ease when I'm stoned
Music fills my ears but its not what's playing on the radio
Am I lost? Here, over there, what is this show
Sleep deprived, shaky, in a dream like state
Nervous, manic looking for someone to relate
Should I call in to life and take this crazy day off
Blurry eyes, hair stands on end I'm here but lost
Almost tripping, yet I have had no drugs to try
So...
#scary
#FeelingLost
#nightmares
542 reads
0 Comments
The hidden side of me (exposing insecurities)
Hi there, you dont know me and I dont know you
What I'm about to say is uncomfortable but here goes
-Sex-
The true inner me is twisted, sad, ugly, full of truth wishing I could die
I have kids but never really enjoyed sex due to molestation and victims of lies
Its been almost 8 years and still uncomfortable when it comes to sex
Only really in the mood with degrading acts but feel as though its disrespect
I have no idea why I am turned on by these crazy and awful things
Wanting to hurt, punish, humiliate are the softer side that thoughts bring ...
What I'm about to say is uncomfortable but here goes
-Sex-
The true inner me is twisted, sad, ugly, full of truth wishing I could die
I have kids but never really enjoyed sex due to molestation and victims of lies
Its been almost 8 years and still uncomfortable when it comes to sex
Only really in the mood with degrading acts but feel as though its disrespect
I have no idea why I am turned on by these crazy and awful things
Wanting to hurt, punish, humiliate are the softer side that thoughts bring ...
#conflict
#confessional
715 reads
4 Comments
Friends? Pt 2
friends have came and gone over the years
but to those who remained through my trials and fears
I really thought like way down deep inside
with love and compassion your in for the life long ride
only those few I entrust the deepest inner me
now stranded in darkness with no friends to see
reaching out not for pity but to see how you've been
the lack of emotions and compassion is this really my friend
swept aside claims of being too busy followed by an empty sorry
communication sparks a smile feeling now ok with me
more silence as days pass on...
but to those who remained through my trials and fears
I really thought like way down deep inside
with love and compassion your in for the life long ride
only those few I entrust the deepest inner me
now stranded in darkness with no friends to see
reaching out not for pity but to see how you've been
the lack of emotions and compassion is this really my friend
swept aside claims of being too busy followed by an empty sorry
communication sparks a smile feeling now ok with me
more silence as days pass on...
#LifeStruggles
331 reads
0 Comments
Friends?
Its nearly 3 am yet again
Up late lonely wondering about friends
I look back on all the friends that come and go
Than there's that rare few that remained for the show
As time presses on suicides leaving me behind
A couple left so distant "busy" sure that's fine
Attempts to find new friends and again just used
Money, greed, my time stolen just more abuse
I fall back on the few true friends that remain
And again just to busy, from them all its just the same
Lonely, stressed, looking for that friend to talk to
Unanswered texts for...
Up late lonely wondering about friends
I look back on all the friends that come and go
Than there's that rare few that remained for the show
As time presses on suicides leaving me behind
A couple left so distant "busy" sure that's fine
Attempts to find new friends and again just used
Money, greed, my time stolen just more abuse
I fall back on the few true friends that remain
And again just to busy, from them all its just the same
Lonely, stressed, looking for that friend to talk to
Unanswered texts for...
#suicide
#TruthOfLife
#frustration
481 reads
3 Comments
Superhero (communication breakdown)
Your absence in communication brought me down from flight
I know your well, but I'm not alright
Mental depression puzzle pieces tumble to the floor
Dry mouth, dilated pupils, awake three days, nearing four
Your perfume bottle is empty and losing its smell
Sold out empty promises but so much left to tell
I dig deeper into a mental bend of nothingness a utopia of apathy
These are the times I can't help but think your mad at me
I cannot fathom why, for I am your superhero
Almost grounded now, incoming ground zero
Separation of the...
I know your well, but I'm not alright
Mental depression puzzle pieces tumble to the floor
Dry mouth, dilated pupils, awake three days, nearing four
Your perfume bottle is empty and losing its smell
Sold out empty promises but so much left to tell
I dig deeper into a mental bend of nothingness a utopia of apathy
These are the times I can't help but think your mad at me
I cannot fathom why, for I am your superhero
Almost grounded now, incoming ground zero
Separation of the...
#love
#heartbroken
#support
#FeelingLost
#emptiness
402 reads
3 Comments
That one game
So I decide to show up to the bubble show. I make eye contact with those green eyes as the little rusty bell sounds my entry. A smile and a wink I approach with a smooth confident stroll. The look on your face, amused and confused. As I lean on the counter the only thing that separated us. You pose your self for an incoming kiss. I lean in close, close enough for a kiss. I whisper softly in your ear lets play some pinball setting a rusty quarter down inviting you to play. Locking eyes in a romantic daze you giggle and say its fifty cents a play. Lol
#kindness
#BestFriend
#friendship
#gratitude
#respect
368 reads
2 Comments
A ode to suicide
To those who say suicide is selfish
Understand you can never understand what they delt with
You may say you have it worse than they did
On deeper levels that shit was well hid
Somethings easy to you may be the hardest for others
Its not easy to leave mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters
Your strength my weakness, your weakness my strength
Those who suffer go through many trials of a dark never ending length
Some wear there scars on there sleeves
Others hide it tucked well deep beneath
Help sometimes is not what they really need
I can...
Understand you can never understand what they delt with
You may say you have it worse than they did
On deeper levels that shit was well hid
Somethings easy to you may be the hardest for others
Its not easy to leave mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters
Your strength my weakness, your weakness my strength
Those who suffer go through many trials of a dark never ending length
Some wear there scars on there sleeves
Others hide it tucked well deep beneath
Help sometimes is not what they really need
I can...
#sadness
#depression
#dark
#death
#suicide
420 reads
5 Comments
Someone like me
Stick me with needles deep into my skin
Extracting the innocence that is held in my mind, deep within
To the social eye I am a monster a demented creep
Behind these scars and sadness better lies beneath
So quick to judge and make an assumption
To fearful to approach, afraid of pushing buttons
I look evil and my poetry is even darker
Separating myself from you all even farther
If you took the time to get to know me
Id bring rest to your worries and curiosity
But make no mistake, you hurt me I will kill
Begging to lock me up...
Extracting the innocence that is held in my mind, deep within
To the social eye I am a monster a demented creep
Behind these scars and sadness better lies beneath
So quick to judge and make an assumption
To fearful to approach, afraid of pushing buttons
I look evil and my poetry is even darker
Separating myself from you all even farther
If you took the time to get to know me
Id bring rest to your worries and curiosity
But make no mistake, you hurt me I will kill
Begging to lock me up...
#sadness
#depression
#shame
#despair
#disappointment
396 reads
0 Comments
A date at eight that I ate
#anger
#hate
#dark
#murder
#death
331 reads
0 Comments
Numbers and nausea
Another poem written, be warned nothing nice
80 degrees today and I am feeling cold as ice
4 beers in not even a mere buzz nor tingle
Work the math work with me
Were now at 320 minus the one for feelings of (insert rhyme)
And came the flood of 100 emotions taking there toll
Trying to find relief with intoxication and rock and roll
That one minute just stole my 420
And there's 69 stinging bees, nothing producing honey
Add that to 37 years of chaos and madness
Its that time once again that we derail the crazy train
Another 12 plus 13 plus...
80 degrees today and I am feeling cold as ice
4 beers in not even a mere buzz nor tingle
Work the math work with me
Were now at 320 minus the one for feelings of (insert rhyme)
And came the flood of 100 emotions taking there toll
Trying to find relief with intoxication and rock and roll
That one minute just stole my 420
And there's 69 stinging bees, nothing producing honey
Add that to 37 years of chaos and madness
Its that time once again that we derail the crazy train
Another 12 plus 13 plus...
#grief
#dark
#death
#memorial
#graveyard
336 reads
0 Comments
Just another
Tonight, I just dont feel the same
Kinda nice, kinda a shame
Two friends left and there fading away
Living yet another fucking day
Depressed but I feel for all the wrong reasons
Standing outside watching the skies change season's
Sick of being a puppet, sick of being used
Sick of my own messed up abuse
Why can't I just let go tonight and be done
No matter what I try life has become dull, nothing fun
I don't even know why I write and communicate it seems all a waste
I'm not even bleeding yet and blood I can...
Kinda nice, kinda a shame
Two friends left and there fading away
Living yet another fucking day
Depressed but I feel for all the wrong reasons
Standing outside watching the skies change season's
Sick of being a puppet, sick of being used
Sick of my own messed up abuse
Why can't I just let go tonight and be done
No matter what I try life has become dull, nothing fun
I don't even know why I write and communicate it seems all a waste
I'm not even bleeding yet and blood I can...
#anger
#regret
#hate
327 reads
2 Comments
What its like?
Its kinda of embarrassing it kills me even more
The only two lovers a loving aunt and a lying whore
What is sex? I often wonder why its so highly talked about
Whenever I try, the past haunts and taunts they always walk out
I'm so full of love, caring, respectful gratitude
Does anyone understand the traumatizing magnitude
Sexual exploitation before I knew what sex was, just another toy
A virgin waiting for a pure love and lies quickly and swiftly destroyed
Humiliated and abused in every way made to feel like shit
I was the man, I was guilty, no...
The only two lovers a loving aunt and a lying whore
What is sex? I often wonder why its so highly talked about
Whenever I try, the past haunts and taunts they always walk out
I'm so full of love, caring, respectful gratitude
Does anyone understand the traumatizing magnitude
Sexual exploitation before I knew what sex was, just another toy
A virgin waiting for a pure love and lies quickly and swiftly destroyed
Humiliated and abused in every way made to feel like shit
I was the man, I was guilty, no...
#sadness
#depression
#dark
#despair
#disappointment
299 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by miseryomy