Dark mist breaks through the seams tainting our bodies when we sleep; polluting our lungs when we breathe. So breathe in, watch through grimy windows and the cracks in this relentless shack, as our past falls to pieces; it won't last. Embracing for the shack's collapse I can never seem to relax; I'm too worried about the impact. Watching as the sunlight seductively kisses the surface of the room. Staying awake all night until falling asleep at noon. The dust and debris from the rubble fills my hands like the surface of the moon. Constantly, I'll overthink,...
From the mouth of a serpent, I'm told exactly what I want to hear. Giving me the comfort from a world I've now come to fear. With open arms and an open space, I made my way into that hollow, empty place. Simply because I needed a place to belong. Just hoping that maybe this time I won't be wrong.
She became my sunshine, and she blinded me with her light until I couldn't see. That's when she brewed a storm in my head, and the clouds she caused filled my thoughts with false realities. The storm has destroyed my home, my happiness, and there's no longer any safety. I will be her next casualty.
We all want something beautiful to say when we experience pain. Something that'll temporarily help you breathe easier and halt the rain.
But how do you speak when your lungs slowly deplete? When you're missing the one crucial piece to once again feel complete? I can't eat, I can't breathe, I can't live, and I can't sleep. I have panic attacks throughout the night, even when I'm in the comfort of my own sheets.
All because I can't handle it when things don't go my way. When I can't withstand the agony of no longer being able to...
That image of you is burned into my head Your wide, bright eyed smile at the table with the menu in your hand. Only this time, I didn't take that picture. That smile isn't for me this time. It's for him now.
You put my soul under your soles and crushed it to dust. But the crushed dust still lusts for you. It lusts for that smile that makes my heart do jumping jacks in my chest for hours. To hear you say you love me again even though it was a lie the first time. But that's fine.
I found out today that maybe I'm not so brave. I found out maybe I'm not so immune to heartbreak. Like a virus pumping through my heart into my veins. A deadly virus of bottled up emotions and constant pain. Realizing you were that one who got away.
You somehow broke me down piece by piece. Taking remains with you, so when I rebuild, I'll never be complete. It was that day you took my self esteem. So, I found out today that maybe I'm not so brave. Because you took all that I ever gave, killed it...
It's been months now since I've even wrote. It's as if I've had a huge knot in my throat. Voiding me from my own self-expression. Just to trap me in a cold room with my old friend, depression. I've been in a slump lately, and my life feels like a sinking ship. I'm just going to drown in the end, regardless of what I do with it. I've been working on change and self-improvement.
Even though I personally don't want to change, other people just think I'm shit. Of course, I'll just pretend I've shrugged them off. But at the end...
Rainy days cause a flood of hurt. Causing waters of words to flood until barriers burst. There's no comfort
Not even in a lovers sheets. No words that can formulate a sentence to make me feel complete. At least not from my mouth.
Emptiness like the hollow holes at the base of trees. It makes a good home for wild life, but not for me. It's only a temporary fill. Making their way deeper into my wooden body like a drill. Only until whatever's living inside decides to leave. Leaving my base once again empty.
Her voice is static in an empty room. Where all of her whispers carry through. Ringing through my ears like a bomb went off in my head. Her melancholy voice makes me feel like I've experienced war, when I've only been staring off in bed. She has too much power for just a soothing whisper. But there's just more that's mesmerizing about her.
Her voice sways like a ship on smooth seas. Never have I felt so enchanted but so free. She has a smile whiter than any angel's wings. And she may not play guitar like I do, but she can fluently play my...
When our eyes connect I feel those sparks, as if you're electrical. When I'm looking through your portals, that are your beautiful, dark irises, I tend to take pictures of your soul. I see every emotion your feeling as if I'm looking through a glass door. I see more than I let you know; I see you to your core. It just took one trip through your beautiful, dark irises. One trip to see you're always having an internal crisis.
Honey, tell me what's on your mind! If it was up to me, I'd make all your problems mine. I'd hold your burdens and sorrow...
Lost time in an unconscious mind. I drift as if I've lost grasp on the concept of time. Clocks are now just pictures on the wall.
My memory is as blurry as a smeared lens. My brain was once a writer that ran out of ink and put down the pen. I just hope he never writes again; no more memories, please.
I no longer find pleasure in words I speak. Because I can't eat, I can't sleep, and I should just wire my jaw shut, so, for once, I don't only have to hear me. My own voice is now a constant ringing in my head.