Submissions by Dirtfarm
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
29th Jul 2015 7:19pm
29th Jul 2015 7:19pm
Qualifications for employment
Manufactured smiles in my field of view
Internationally recognized for what the hell do you want
I’m not providing any information that would seem too technical
staying flexible to the process
my expectations deflated again
I stand here with the highest of ethical behavior
that applicable laws will allow in such an establishment
as I repeat, no that’s not what I fucking ordered
coffee, and a sausage biscuit to go please
Internationally recognized for what the hell do you want
I’m not providing any information that would seem too technical
staying flexible to the process
my expectations deflated again
I stand here with the highest of ethical behavior
that applicable laws will allow in such an establishment
as I repeat, no that’s not what I fucking ordered
coffee, and a sausage biscuit to go please
767 reads
2 Comments
DRUGS POEM
Published
28th Jul 2015 2:19pm
28th Jul 2015 2:19pm
When does the compass need recalibration
absence of a guard helps with strategic strikes
surprise can be a mutha fucker
making you realize
cowardly dogs always bite at the ankles when you’re not looking
cutting off the legs
puts you on a level playing field with midgets
at that height your balls drag
causing excessive wear to the sack
I’ve been guessing my speed lately
stopped counting lines on the coffee table
cause the effect differs from the potency
no focus and out of balance
directed by a higher authority
Oxy and gentleman jack is at the wheel
chewed on a bloody...
surprise can be a mutha fucker
making you realize
cowardly dogs always bite at the ankles when you’re not looking
cutting off the legs
puts you on a level playing field with midgets
at that height your balls drag
causing excessive wear to the sack
I’ve been guessing my speed lately
stopped counting lines on the coffee table
cause the effect differs from the potency
no focus and out of balance
directed by a higher authority
Oxy and gentleman jack is at the wheel
chewed on a bloody...
893 reads
8 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
1st Jul 2014 6:09pm
1st Jul 2014 6:09pm
Big backyards don’t always bring happiness
The birds in the attic have been chirping louder
can’t seem to add enough salt to satisfy my taste
and the headlights aren’t cutting through the fog anymore
fuck this rinse and repeat lifestyle
being led by my cock
I’ve left my natural element
sitting on this rock smiling for the pic’s
waiting on my keeper to leave the gate open so I can maul a nigga
Suburbia
a place where bath salts are soaked in and not sniffed
suicide awareness is seen on TV and not taught by your dead fucking neighbor
the only bitches walking the street has another on a leash...
can’t seem to add enough salt to satisfy my taste
and the headlights aren’t cutting through the fog anymore
fuck this rinse and repeat lifestyle
being led by my cock
I’ve left my natural element
sitting on this rock smiling for the pic’s
waiting on my keeper to leave the gate open so I can maul a nigga
Suburbia
a place where bath salts are soaked in and not sniffed
suicide awareness is seen on TV and not taught by your dead fucking neighbor
the only bitches walking the street has another on a leash...
946 reads
9 Comments
MISCELLANEOUS POEM
Published
23rd May 2014 6:47pm
23rd May 2014 6:47pm
Jesus was spotted at 103rd and Floreance
The clown in the background is mocking me
not one of those haha its ya birthday bitch clowns, but a rodeo clown
riding a majestic donkey while scoring the goat roping
a huge oak sways with those damn circus monkeys hanging from each limb
not sure who hung the bastards, but I’m not upset about it
hear they sling shit at you
that reminds me of a poodle I saw at the vet wearing a diaper
wonder if it slung shit or was it just that old and needed one
either way you can’t look all hard and shit while walking that mutt through the hood
however that’s a...
not one of those haha its ya birthday bitch clowns, but a rodeo clown
riding a majestic donkey while scoring the goat roping
a huge oak sways with those damn circus monkeys hanging from each limb
not sure who hung the bastards, but I’m not upset about it
hear they sling shit at you
that reminds me of a poodle I saw at the vet wearing a diaper
wonder if it slung shit or was it just that old and needed one
either way you can’t look all hard and shit while walking that mutt through the hood
however that’s a...
798 reads
4 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
21st May 2014 4:24pm
21st May 2014 4:24pm
Tell me again what's wrong
The blank stare tells me we're not on the same playing field
you strike me as the type guy who uses hand sanitizer before jerking off
don’t get me wrong, the fucking couch is comfortable
but the diploma displayed proudly on the wall
doesn’t ease the questions you want answered
and I need a cup holder for my spit cup
I enjoy the feeling that pounding flesh gives me
nothing satisfies more than driving your fist into a man’s head
except of course elbows across the bridge of his nose
punches to the kidney and liver area tenderizes the body
like...
you strike me as the type guy who uses hand sanitizer before jerking off
don’t get me wrong, the fucking couch is comfortable
but the diploma displayed proudly on the wall
doesn’t ease the questions you want answered
and I need a cup holder for my spit cup
I enjoy the feeling that pounding flesh gives me
nothing satisfies more than driving your fist into a man’s head
except of course elbows across the bridge of his nose
punches to the kidney and liver area tenderizes the body
like...
823 reads
3 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
20th May 2014 4:22pm
20th May 2014 4:22pm
Gathering wood for the bonfire
Words are false idols
never knew silence could be so loud
the darkness brings light to memories I wish to forget
your words stuck on fucking replay tormenting my every thought
I will love you forever
echoing inside my head like a bullet that cant penetrate the “white meat”
yeah, I keep my shit locked away
happiness only comes a couple days a month
blonde hair with blue eyes screaming daddy jumps from the car
the same car I’ve imagined burning down with you and your new semen donor in it
she’s grown so much in the last few years
soon...
never knew silence could be so loud
the darkness brings light to memories I wish to forget
your words stuck on fucking replay tormenting my every thought
I will love you forever
echoing inside my head like a bullet that cant penetrate the “white meat”
yeah, I keep my shit locked away
happiness only comes a couple days a month
blonde hair with blue eyes screaming daddy jumps from the car
the same car I’ve imagined burning down with you and your new semen donor in it
she’s grown so much in the last few years
soon...
900 reads
2 Comments
SONG LYRICS
Published
9th May 2014 8:31pm
9th May 2014 8:31pm
Superman stole my logo
only the strong survive
only the strong survive
ate my own fetus
flossed with the cord
while the doctor wiped excellence from my ass
only the strong survive
I walk through hell just to heat my lunch
pimp slapped an angel
Satan tatoos my picture on his arm
only the strong survive
fed shamu to Godzilla
dry humped the leg of lady liberty
had a great white puke on my chum
only the strong survive
Marta Stewart crocheted a hat for my penis
Bill Gates fluffs my pillow
Jesus reads my book
only the strong survive
I cut through the...
only the strong survive
ate my own fetus
flossed with the cord
while the doctor wiped excellence from my ass
only the strong survive
I walk through hell just to heat my lunch
pimp slapped an angel
Satan tatoos my picture on his arm
only the strong survive
fed shamu to Godzilla
dry humped the leg of lady liberty
had a great white puke on my chum
only the strong survive
Marta Stewart crocheted a hat for my penis
Bill Gates fluffs my pillow
Jesus reads my book
only the strong survive
I cut through the...
841 reads
8 Comments
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
7th May 2014 1:40pm
7th May 2014 1:40pm
I’m a believer
haven’t shown much initiative lately
mainly because no one told me to
who said diapers are for old folks
I see nothing wrong with pissing yourself during a good show
besides, this late night evangelist has me thinking about writing another hot check
wonder if they will send me that prayer cloth before it goes through
used the last one during a recent toilet paper shortage
my ass and soul has never felt cleaner
mainly because no one told me to
who said diapers are for old folks
I see nothing wrong with pissing yourself during a good show
besides, this late night evangelist has me thinking about writing another hot check
wonder if they will send me that prayer cloth before it goes through
used the last one during a recent toilet paper shortage
my ass and soul has never felt cleaner
795 reads
2 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
18th Feb 2014 7:08pm
18th Feb 2014 7:08pm
You better let that one dry
Relieved myself outside today
been taking things back to nature
since you left calling me a fucking animal
I really like your new place
the “Welcome Home” door mat is a nice touch
gives it that warm, inviting appeal
must be working baby
cause a dog took a shit on it this morning
been taking things back to nature
since you left calling me a fucking animal
I really like your new place
the “Welcome Home” door mat is a nice touch
gives it that warm, inviting appeal
must be working baby
cause a dog took a shit on it this morning
744 reads
6 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
14th Feb 2014 00:05am
14th Feb 2014 00:05am
Nice shoes your wearing
Psychotic thoughts drive rhythmic actions
annoying knocks are sometimes answered
with no regard to their consequence’s
need a dark room to lie down in
chains are heavy
stored in the medicine cabinet
they keep me from catapulting my neighbor
found reality unreal and distant
voting myself off the island
made me become a cutter without scars
at least that’s what the distinguished gentleman in me thinks
looking back at the cluttered shelf of bad memories
is like being broke and barefoot
standing in the middle of a shoe store
unless you’re...
annoying knocks are sometimes answered
with no regard to their consequence’s
need a dark room to lie down in
chains are heavy
stored in the medicine cabinet
they keep me from catapulting my neighbor
found reality unreal and distant
voting myself off the island
made me become a cutter without scars
at least that’s what the distinguished gentleman in me thinks
looking back at the cluttered shelf of bad memories
is like being broke and barefoot
standing in the middle of a shoe store
unless you’re...
738 reads
6 Comments
ANGER POEM
Published
12th Feb 2014 5:43pm
12th Feb 2014 5:43pm
The Devil said give me a call
Nothing is more fucked up than
late night phone sex infomercials
half-dressed sexy ass women
prancing around holding a damn telephone
Satans direct hot line 1-900-ULONELY
flashes at the bottom of the screen
just below her massive tits
playing peek-a-boo with a halter top
I hope you die a miserable death inventor of the phone sex guy
you knew a brother would be fucked up by this time of night
owning a credit card that doesn’t register time
the smack is working and the bitch sounds good
I fucking hate you
you intelligent bastard
...
late night phone sex infomercials
half-dressed sexy ass women
prancing around holding a damn telephone
Satans direct hot line 1-900-ULONELY
flashes at the bottom of the screen
just below her massive tits
playing peek-a-boo with a halter top
I hope you die a miserable death inventor of the phone sex guy
you knew a brother would be fucked up by this time of night
owning a credit card that doesn’t register time
the smack is working and the bitch sounds good
I fucking hate you
you intelligent bastard
...
812 reads
2 Comments
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
12th Feb 2014 2:59am
12th Feb 2014 2:59am
Is it write or right, I get them confused sometimes
Hope it rains soon
it helps wash the shit
from where kats gather
his way, her way, their way
proper form and technique
only cause those gaseous bubbles
to spew from ones ass
using rhythm and rhyme
to cover the stench of a poem
structure, spacing, punctuation
metaphors, nouns, adverbs
text book dialect speaks from experience
because I’m a true student of poetry
with shit on amazon and a web site my cousin set up
welcome to the collage of retarded poets
please feel free to drool and chew on the fucking...
it helps wash the shit
from where kats gather
his way, her way, their way
proper form and technique
only cause those gaseous bubbles
to spew from ones ass
using rhythm and rhyme
to cover the stench of a poem
structure, spacing, punctuation
metaphors, nouns, adverbs
text book dialect speaks from experience
because I’m a true student of poetry
with shit on amazon and a web site my cousin set up
welcome to the collage of retarded poets
please feel free to drool and chew on the fucking...
820 reads
3 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by Dirtfarm
