Submissions by Anna_A
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
I will be Queen!
She smirked
With a remarkable resemblance
To Miranda Richardson
Playing Elizabeth the First
Just as soon as I can bump off
My new Sister-in-Law
Korporate Kate
That two bit Sloan
It shall be I who is
Next in line to it all!
I hear there’s a story about some
Princes, a Tower and a wall
Get that done it will be I
Who shall take the British throne….
Although I will have to brush up
Maybe take the Royal Tour
Incognito of course,
Paying special attention to the Tour Guide, ...
With a remarkable resemblance
To Miranda Richardson
Playing Elizabeth the First
Just as soon as I can bump off
My new Sister-in-Law
Korporate Kate
That two bit Sloan
It shall be I who is
Next in line to it all!
I hear there’s a story about some
Princes, a Tower and a wall
Get that done it will be I
Who shall take the British throne….
Although I will have to brush up
Maybe take the Royal Tour
Incognito of course,
Paying special attention to the Tour Guide, ...
535 reads
2 Comments
A Man is Arrested for Telling a Joke
A man is arrested for telling a joke
About an organisation
He called ‘The Council’
Which is run by morons
But the man doth protest!
It was another Council, another Council!
Not our own ‘illustrious’
* Council
No, the Policeman says,
You clearly used the word
‘Morons’
(*add the name of your own local council/ tax payer funded local or national government office here - which is run by morons)
About an organisation
He called ‘The Council’
Which is run by morons
But the man doth protest!
It was another Council, another Council!
Not our own ‘illustrious’
* Council
No, the Policeman says,
You clearly used the word
‘Morons’
(*add the name of your own local council/ tax payer funded local or national government office here - which is run by morons)
513 reads
2 Comments
Neoliberalism Explained
There are some bad people in nice suits
Those politicians don’t work for us
They work for the bad people in nice suits
That’s it really
Those politicians don’t work for us
They work for the bad people in nice suits
That’s it really
575 reads
4 Comments
Tony Blair – The Tammy Wynette of British Politics
Sometimes it's hard to be a Prime Minister
Giving all your love to just one man (George Bush)
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand
And if you love him, oh be proud of him
'Cause after all he's just a man.
Stand by your man, give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can. ...
Giving all your love to just one man (George Bush)
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand
And if you love him, oh be proud of him
'Cause after all he's just a man.
Stand by your man, give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can. ...
711 reads
3 Comments
How to Get a Man
If you haven’t got laid
In a while
Despite doing all you can
To get a d*ck inside
Set up a group,
Recruit concerned peers
To talk about
Issues of the day
The environment, poverty, tax
Anything in the world
Which goes against the
Establishment’s fold
And low and behold!
There they are
The Undercover Boys in Blue
‘Infiltrating’
(That means f*cking to me and you)
And I for one will try and stay strong
Withholding information for as long as I can
Ensuring he f*cks me
In every room...
In a while
Despite doing all you can
To get a d*ck inside
Set up a group,
Recruit concerned peers
To talk about
Issues of the day
The environment, poverty, tax
Anything in the world
Which goes against the
Establishment’s fold
And low and behold!
There they are
The Undercover Boys in Blue
‘Infiltrating’
(That means f*cking to me and you)
And I for one will try and stay strong
Withholding information for as long as I can
Ensuring he f*cks me
In every room...
575 reads
1 Comment
My Home Town
My Home Town
It used to be nice
In the North
When we were working class
Not just poor
Neighbours would
Chat and laugh,
Exchange news and views
Over the garden fence
Children were safe
To play out all day
Those living on the street
Would make sure it was that way
Not everyone had a phone
Or a car
Or had a foreign holiday
But we didn’t mind
Because what we had
Where we lived
Meant it was
A nice place to be
Friends and family
Lived nearby
Always someone around
To...
It used to be nice
In the North
When we were working class
Not just poor
Neighbours would
Chat and laugh,
Exchange news and views
Over the garden fence
Children were safe
To play out all day
Those living on the street
Would make sure it was that way
Not everyone had a phone
Or a car
Or had a foreign holiday
But we didn’t mind
Because what we had
Where we lived
Meant it was
A nice place to be
Friends and family
Lived nearby
Always someone around
To...
621 reads
2 Comments
Join the Tory Party!
Do you want to
Break the law
Evade your taxes (legally)
Rob the poor?
Do you want to
Live a life
That’s not
Morally right?
Do you want to
Buy a cut price slice of
Our public sector
And for tax reasons
Register it offshore
In the name of your dog Hector
Knowing the Inland Revenue
Will never get you?
Do you want to
Change the law?
Well that’s what lobbying is for
Means you’re guaranteed
To get your way over the poor,
Because you’re worth more!
Do you want to ...
Break the law
Evade your taxes (legally)
Rob the poor?
Do you want to
Live a life
That’s not
Morally right?
Do you want to
Buy a cut price slice of
Our public sector
And for tax reasons
Register it offshore
In the name of your dog Hector
Knowing the Inland Revenue
Will never get you?
Do you want to
Change the law?
Well that’s what lobbying is for
Means you’re guaranteed
To get your way over the poor,
Because you’re worth more!
Do you want to ...
607 reads
2 Comments
Sam Cam
Sam Cam what did you do?
Baked cakes on the telly
Made the tea (once)
At election time
Tell us your husband was great
Made sure you wore designer clothes
On every date
Fronted up a business so
Your husband could tell us the
Economy had not laid waste
You never spoke (bit like ‘Princess Kate’)
Never cared
About those who are struggling
In so many ways
We never saw you helping the poor
Petitioning your husbands or his
Insidious globalisation friends
To help keep the wolves from our door ...
Baked cakes on the telly
Made the tea (once)
At election time
Tell us your husband was great
Made sure you wore designer clothes
On every date
Fronted up a business so
Your husband could tell us the
Economy had not laid waste
You never spoke (bit like ‘Princess Kate’)
Never cared
About those who are struggling
In so many ways
We never saw you helping the poor
Petitioning your husbands or his
Insidious globalisation friends
To help keep the wolves from our door ...
970 reads
5 Comments
The Northern Powerhouse - Ode to Gideon
Gideon in his high viz vest
Trying his best
To look like those
Who graft for work
Forgetting we have a long tradition
Of this in the North
He doesn’t pass for a man
Who could load a van with 2 by 4
So if he thinks he has fooled us
The answer is no
Gideon, just take your
High vis vest and go
Maggie’s little helper may do well to note
That the North has long since
Had a deep mistrust of you all
If you think we were fooled
By ‘Honest Dave’
The working man’s friend....think again
The pain still...
Trying his best
To look like those
Who graft for work
Forgetting we have a long tradition
Of this in the North
He doesn’t pass for a man
Who could load a van with 2 by 4
So if he thinks he has fooled us
The answer is no
Gideon, just take your
High vis vest and go
Maggie’s little helper may do well to note
That the North has long since
Had a deep mistrust of you all
If you think we were fooled
By ‘Honest Dave’
The working man’s friend....think again
The pain still...
715 reads
4 Comments
The Day After the UK EU Referendum Campaign
The public turned out
Ballots were counted
And the results read out
Surely that’s it
That’s how democracy works
Whether you like it or not
The will of the majority wins out?
But those who love money
Don’t like to lose
The markets have already had a pay out
From our National Bank
Added to the debt of the UK taxpayer no doubt
To sure up those bets they made yesterday
Speculating on the pound
Thinking during a referendum was a good time
To financially win out
Is nothing sacred in our land?
Sadiq...
Ballots were counted
And the results read out
Surely that’s it
That’s how democracy works
Whether you like it or not
The will of the majority wins out?
But those who love money
Don’t like to lose
The markets have already had a pay out
From our National Bank
Added to the debt of the UK taxpayer no doubt
To sure up those bets they made yesterday
Speculating on the pound
Thinking during a referendum was a good time
To financially win out
Is nothing sacred in our land?
Sadiq...
589 reads
4 Comments
The UK EU Referendum Campaign
If you feel sick
At what you have seen
From politicians
During the UK 2016
EU referendum campaign
Imagine how it would be
If we had none of them
For 589 days
Say we’ll give them that long
To mend their ways
To think of us instead of themselves
And their tax avoiding business friends
Who live only for power and wealth
But you may say
No Government for 589 days!!
it’ll be anarchy!!
Everything will fall!!
They’ll be chaos on the streets!!
No I don’t want that at all!!
I’d rather...
At what you have seen
From politicians
During the UK 2016
EU referendum campaign
Imagine how it would be
If we had none of them
For 589 days
Say we’ll give them that long
To mend their ways
To think of us instead of themselves
And their tax avoiding business friends
Who live only for power and wealth
But you may say
No Government for 589 days!!
it’ll be anarchy!!
Everything will fall!!
They’ll be chaos on the streets!!
No I don’t want that at all!!
I’d rather...
615 reads
3 Comments
Cosmopolitan Magazine!
Cosmopolitan Magazine!
The bible of my youth
How to be a ‘modern girl’
In this brave new modern world
Pages of ‘recipes’ for how to live my life
How to be a bright young thing
And for later,
How it would be when I became a wife
Because you see
According to ‘Cosmo’
It wasn’t going to be
Just how it had always been
For generations of women from the North
It promised a new dawn
Where men would be
Sensitive to emotions
Active in childcare
Attentive around the home
They wouldn’t just come in...
The bible of my youth
How to be a ‘modern girl’
In this brave new modern world
Pages of ‘recipes’ for how to live my life
How to be a bright young thing
And for later,
How it would be when I became a wife
Because you see
According to ‘Cosmo’
It wasn’t going to be
Just how it had always been
For generations of women from the North
It promised a new dawn
Where men would be
Sensitive to emotions
Active in childcare
Attentive around the home
They wouldn’t just come in...
655 reads
2 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by Anna_A