Observational Poems Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poetry about life, society and the natural world
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
Alviola
Poem Published
Today 6:21am
Today 6:21am
The Color of Someday
There is no color in Gaza save one,
it is the color of limbs and clothes aghast,
here there are bicycles and dresses but
only in the color of veiled mothers
with frozen mouths thumping chests watching heaven.
The children there disappear like magic,
a mile away, the angry jew waves
his hand with the flourish of humph
giddy children vanish to a mist, stain air
but not the shore to a sea they cannot swim in.
Here bullets shred, a child is carried in
a white plastic bag the supermarket
gives you for your sharp cheeses and...
it is the color of limbs and clothes aghast,
here there are bicycles and dresses but
only in the color of veiled mothers
with frozen mouths thumping chests watching heaven.
The children there disappear like magic,
a mile away, the angry jew waves
his hand with the flourish of humph
giddy children vanish to a mist, stain air
but not the shore to a sea they cannot swim in.
Here bullets shred, a child is carried in
a white plastic bag the supermarket
gives you for your sharp cheeses and...
#freedom
5 reads
0 Comments
The_Silly_Sibyl
Essex Boy
Essex Boy
Poem Published
Yesterday 4:46pm
Yesterday 4:46pm
Graveyard Birds
My grandmother says that my brother won't change
until our father dies
and like the black and evil birds
that gather in graveyards
(the proverbial murder of crows)
we, the children of
his car-crash marriages,
come to claim his house,
to sell the naval engineer's worldly excrescence:
the scratched and broken DVDs
collected and pointlessly stored
back when his last wife died,
the tankard and the GRANDDAD mug
I bought him on a whim,
the entertainment centres and
other bibelots of engineering craft;
I...
until our father dies
and like the black and evil birds
that gather in graveyards
(the proverbial murder of crows)
we, the children of
his car-crash marriages,
come to claim his house,
to sell the naval engineer's worldly excrescence:
the scratched and broken DVDs
collected and pointlessly stored
back when his last wife died,
the tankard and the GRANDDAD mug
I bought him on a whim,
the entertainment centres and
other bibelots of engineering craft;
I...
#father
20 reads
3 Comments
Li0nsWater
Poem Published
Yesterday 12:51pm
Yesterday 12:51pm
High School Dropout (Butterfly Cinquain)
Sitting
across; looking
at school. Nothing is taught.
Transformation not an option.
Conform
to marginalization.
Never knowing thyself,
makes ignorance,
not, bliss.
across; looking
at school. Nothing is taught.
Transformation not an option.
Conform
to marginalization.
Never knowing thyself,
makes ignorance,
not, bliss.
#honesty
#frustration
#disappointment #wisdom
#disappointment #wisdom
8 reads
1 Comment
arortiz73
MTP
MTP
Poem Published
Yesterday 1:52am
Yesterday 1:52am
Her History
His hearse story was her history.
She wrecked him, and hysterectomy's
how she left him. An asshole,
burrows long into her years.
A rear-end won't ever mend
the rust resultant of the tears.
She said, "had he stayed a dick to me,
it would have happened appendectomy.
I only have one fear, I'll never get to share
the sear of being worser for the wear."
And she borrows... wreckage from the pit.
Abandoned only justifies her feelings of regret,
in the sorrow, tomorrow never sets.
She may be leaving for today,
bu the tree is all...
She wrecked him, and hysterectomy's
how she left him. An asshole,
burrows long into her years.
A rear-end won't ever mend
the rust resultant of the tears.
She said, "had he stayed a dick to me,
it would have happened appendectomy.
I only have one fear, I'll never get to share
the sear of being worser for the wear."
And she borrows... wreckage from the pit.
Abandoned only justifies her feelings of regret,
in the sorrow, tomorrow never sets.
She may be leaving for today,
bu the tree is all...
#monsters
13 reads
0 Comments
garyd
Poem Published
13th May 2021 11:59pm
13th May 2021 11:59pm
One Last Thing
I ask of you one last thing
Bring me down to the sea before I die
My fingers are cold and bent from a life spent working with my hands
My legs are sore from years of walking on unyielding concrete
My back, bent over from carrying the burden of living, yearns to straighten once more as in my younger days
In my youth I traveled the mountains
They sang to me for a while
But their voice grew dim over time and then stopped
The winters grew grayer and more difficult to navigate
They lingered longer each year
The springs and summers grew...
Bring me down to the sea before I die
My fingers are cold and bent from a life spent working with my hands
My legs are sore from years of walking on unyielding concrete
My back, bent over from carrying the burden of living, yearns to straighten once more as in my younger days
In my youth I traveled the mountains
They sang to me for a while
But their voice grew dim over time and then stopped
The winters grew grayer and more difficult to navigate
They lingered longer each year
The springs and summers grew...
#strength
#hope
#emotions
14 reads
1 Comment
OyateInyanNajin
Poem Published
13th May 2021 10:48pm
13th May 2021 10:48pm
MORE OR NOTHING AT ALL (a simple key to greater understanding; 5-12-2021, STARBUCKS RESERVE, Palm Springs, California)
even one
simple word
such as
ocean
sun
dream
sky
life
or
love
filtered through
mind
thoughts or senses
can either
hold
for some
no further
meaning at all
yet for
others
at times
more experientially
open
more imaginatively
receptive
or evolved
even one
simple word
such as
ocean
sun
dream
sky
life
or
love
may often
contain
in the bones
of their
form
boundlessly resonant
broader deeper ...
simple word
such as
ocean
sun
dream
sky
life
or
love
filtered through
mind
thoughts or senses
can either
hold
for some
no further
meaning at all
yet for
others
at times
more experientially
open
more imaginatively
receptive
or evolved
even one
simple word
such as
ocean
sun
dream
sky
life
or
love
may often
contain
in the bones
of their
form
boundlessly resonant
broader deeper ...
#LifeAsAWriter
#PowerOfWords
#philosophical
#StreamOfConsciousness
#reading
12 reads
0 Comments
Academic
Poem Published
13th May 2021 9:03pm
13th May 2021 9:03pm
Mass delusions, and their alternate reality by sickening white has-beens, Karens, wannabes and vile nonentities!
By Stanley Collymore
Absolutely great, I readily
confess, to see distinctly
and highly committed
impressively conscionably minded Irish Americans, and chief among
them the US President, Joe Biden
quite proudly standing up to the
delusional and endemically too
barbaric; actually, white British
plus their so patently Coconut
and discernibly House Nigger
Useful Idiots. And absolutely
precisely how commendably
it would be if, let's say, some
stray USA, nuclear weapons
did accidentally -...
Absolutely great, I readily
confess, to see distinctly
and highly committed
impressively conscionably minded Irish Americans, and chief among
them the US President, Joe Biden
quite proudly standing up to the
delusional and endemically too
barbaric; actually, white British
plus their so patently Coconut
and discernibly House Nigger
Useful Idiots. And absolutely
precisely how commendably
it would be if, let's say, some
stray USA, nuclear weapons
did accidentally -...
#jealousy
#hate
#dark
#denial
#fear
26 reads
0 Comments
theyrejustwords
Poem Published
13th May 2021 4:54pm
13th May 2021 4:54pm
amado
my butterflies begat a zephyr
that flipped our calendars to may.
fear grips the summer’s heat:
it will wilt what was.
by nature
time passes.
time’s passing
and times passed.
watch as momentary newness
struggles to catch every falling october leaf.
raking together the missed into a pile
to relish in it anew. smile,
there is always a way back to time’s
forever fleeting antithesis:
now. oh,
my dear beloved,
there is only now.
that flipped our calendars to may.
fear grips the summer’s heat:
it will wilt what was.
by nature
time passes.
time’s passing
and times passed.
watch as momentary newness
struggles to catch every falling october leaf.
raking together the missed into a pile
to relish in it anew. smile,
there is always a way back to time’s
forever fleeting antithesis:
now. oh,
my dear beloved,
there is only now.
#happiness
#romantic
#motivational
#gratitude
#acceptance
17 reads
2 Comments
Academic
Poem Published
13th May 2021 11:34am
13th May 2021 11:34am
Silence is not a just option when ignorance and stupidity are the delusional norm in any supposedly enlightened society!
By Stanley Collymore
There are certain empirical
rights, that very evidently
also, in this distinctively
communual world of ours clearly
do exist, but really lying - plainly
and simply, quite naturally isn't
one of them; and so justifiably
as it's actually, undeniably too
credibly and unequivocally by
its innate nature, intrinsically
consistently and very wrong.
Consequently we've literally
hundreds of noticeably vile
sickeningly so, endemically
and enduringly thick Daily ...
There are certain empirical
rights, that very evidently
also, in this distinctively
communual world of ours clearly
do exist, but really lying - plainly
and simply, quite naturally isn't
one of them; and so justifiably
as it's actually, undeniably too
credibly and unequivocally by
its innate nature, intrinsically
consistently and very wrong.
Consequently we've literally
hundreds of noticeably vile
sickeningly so, endemically
and enduringly thick Daily ...
#hate
#dark
#shame
#denial
#emptiness
28 reads
0 Comments
drone
Poem Published
13th May 2021 10:25am
13th May 2021 10:25am
Eerie
Surreal
is it not
when one stands
in the moonlight
and listens
to the silence
of ones thoughts
is it not
when one stands
in the moonlight
and listens
to the silence
of ones thoughts
#identity
#SelfReflection
21 reads
3 Comments
drone
Poem Published
13th May 2021 10:07am
13th May 2021 10:07am
Scars
Is the list
long
those
psychological scars
of defeated belief's
that one has collected
over the years
in ones life
where the new
feel worse
then the ones before
different words
same rhythm
same subjects
with a different
face
beating ones head
against a wall
like a fool
knowing
that there is
a way out of this
as one watch's
ones feelings
passing by
with no direction
with no
Guidance
becoming
nothing more
just psychological scars
a...
long
those
psychological scars
of defeated belief's
that one has collected
over the years
in ones life
where the new
feel worse
then the ones before
different words
same rhythm
same subjects
with a different
face
beating ones head
against a wall
like a fool
knowing
that there is
a way out of this
as one watch's
ones feelings
passing by
with no direction
with no
Guidance
becoming
nothing more
just psychological scars
a...
#identity
#LifeStruggles
#TruthOfLife
#honesty
#SelfReflection
8 reads
0 Comments
PittinixDesigns
Poem Published
13th May 2021 00:26am
13th May 2021 00:26am
The Preposterous Law
Why are prisoners not allowed to have sex with their mates of the opposite-sex?
If a woman agrees to have sex with her man in prison and vice versa,
The preposterous law does not allow this reasonable thing to happen
Yet the law cannot prevent inmates from having sex with inmates of the same sex
Homosexual and lesbian sexual activity continues to happen in prisons
Something needs to be done about the situation, it is no laughing matter
The law of mankind is a deception and it does not encourage morals
Prisoners are not entirely denied the right to have...
If a woman agrees to have sex with her man in prison and vice versa,
The preposterous law does not allow this reasonable thing to happen
Yet the law cannot prevent inmates from having sex with inmates of the same sex
Homosexual and lesbian sexual activity continues to happen in prisons
Something needs to be done about the situation, it is no laughing matter
The law of mankind is a deception and it does not encourage morals
Prisoners are not entirely denied the right to have...
#lesbian
#gay
#sex
#prison
#morality
19 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Poems Seeking Critique about Life, Society and the World
