Things I have learned thusfar from Ahavati's honest critique:
* Try not to rhyme like you're writing a nursery rhyme
Unless you're writing a nursery rhyme or entering a Dr. Seuss competition! * Don't be afraid to use a semi colon
Word * Don't repeat the same word in a verse
This is where it gets tricky. Sometimes repeating the same word in a verse, stanza, or even line works - conversely, sometimes it does not. It all depends on the genre of writing. To the untrained eye it can be difficult to spot, as outsider art. Like outsider art, it has that 'thing' which resonates. * Cut away the deadwood (this one I've read in Orson Welles' advice to writers)
#Strunkism 4-eva! Seriously, that PDF pushed me to the next level I had been seeking regarding writing. I will always love you for posting that. I'd love to see more honest critique here in DUP, I mark my sensitive stuff for friendly feedback but as I'm just an extremely novice writer I value that experienced eye more than anything. Uh, I'm so frikkin lazy though.
Really enjoying this thread!
A thorough, honest critique can be a very time-consuming process. The least amount of time I have spent on one averaged 30 minutes. The more technical ones average anywhere from 1-4 hours. Some even longer, over a period of days.
We critique all requests very
seriously. You ( general not literal ) are putting your trust in us by asking. Our response could either propel or deter writers from pursuing a writing career. Sometimes we only have one shot to inspire them to, as Rilke says in his book Letters to a Young Poet
“Go into yourself. Find out the reason that commands you to write; see whether it has spread its roots into the very depths of your heart; confess to yourself whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write. This most of all: ask yourself in the most silent hour of your night: must I write? Dig into yourself for a deep answer. And if this answer rings out in assent, if you meet this solemn question with a strong, simple “I must,” then build your life in accordance with this necessity
; your whole life, even into its humblest and most indifferent hour, must become a sign and witness to this impulse. Then come close to Nature. Then, as if no one had ever tried before, try to say what you see and feel and love and lose..."
I highly recommend that book if you haven't read it, btw. We recently held a classic comp on Rilke and posted the above quote. https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/forum/competitions/read/10367/