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Terrible Foreplay

poet Anonymous

Northern_Soul said:

That’s quite a hand injury.

“Hey Baby… you like sausages, cause i’m about to banger raw…”

Could you imagine 🤣🤣🤣


Hail Mary full of grace….


Wondering what the neighbours would think the screams of agony overshadowing the screams of what ever the fuck would be coming out of her mouth….

I am legitimately pissing myself laughing

Northern_Soul
Northern_Soul
-Missy-
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Nevermindthegaps said:

Wondering what the neighbours would think the screams of agony overshadowing the screams of what ever the fuck would be coming out of her mouth….

I am legitimately pissing myself laughing


Mate I have just legit shot tea out my nose onto my phone screen. Most laughs I’ve had in the forum for ages.

Betty
Betty
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Northern_Soul said:

Mate I have just legit shot tea out my nose onto my phone screen. Most laughs I’ve had in the forum for ages.


Missy, right? What happened to the insanity?! This place was the best part of the whole shitshow. Like, everyone is so stuck up their ass now that I’m afraid to rip a fart joke. (Laugh you bitches)

But hey….

You look like a happy meal, cause I’m gonna make you come with a toy inside.

(Please don’t block me)


Northern_Soul
Northern_Soul
-Missy-
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Betty said:

Missy, right? What happened to the insanity?! This place was the best part of the whole shitshow. Like, everyone is so stuck up their ass now that I’m afraid to rip a fart joke. (Laugh you bitches)

But hey….

You look like a happy meal, cause I’m gonna make you come with a toy inside.

(Please don’t block me)



Preach, gurl. Preach.

How about … if you were a transformer you’d be OPTIMUS FINE

_feral
_feral
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i had a dude on the taimi app that opened up with

"you look a little constipated can i push your stool in?"

Northern_Soul
Northern_Soul
-Missy-
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_feral said:i had a dude on the taimi app that opened up with

"you look a little constipated can i push your stool in?"


What. The actual. (And I cannot stress this enough). Fuck.

_feral
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Northern_Soul said:

What. The actual. (And I cannot stress this enough). Fuck.



i told you they were pretty specialist vits 🤣

Betty
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_feral said:


i told you they were pretty specialist vits 🤣


Hands down, that is the shittiest pick up line, ever.



poet Anonymous

Betty said:

Hands down, that is the shittiest pick up line, ever.




What’s worse than having your proctologist say, look that’s not good?

When he says look, no hands

Betty
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Nevermindthegaps said:

What’s worse than having your proctologist say, look that’s not good?

When he says look, no hands


Aw damn, about to hijack the bad pick up lines with bad butt-sex jokes.

So when I was talking about analingus, I was being tounge-in-cheek.


Carpe_Noctem
Carpe_Noctem
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Betty said:

Aw damn, about to hijack the bad pick up lines with bad butt-sex jokes.

So when I was talking about analingus, I was being tounge-in-cheek.



Could it also be classified as finger lickin good?

No rubber minimal lube

Betty
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Carpe_Noctem said:

Could it also be classified as finger lickin good?

No rubber minimal lube


Carpe, that was painful



poet Anonymous



Man walks up to a woman vigorously rubbing his face and cheeks with a napkin looks over says

Just being a gentleman and cleaning your seat for you love

Northern_Soul
Northern_Soul
-Missy-
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Hey girl… are you a beaver? Because DAMN.

poet Anonymous

I haven’t laughed so hard at so much stupid in a long time,

Did you know the difference between a French kiss and an Australian kiss?

An Australian kiss goes down unda

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